Today, a classmate wished me a “Happy Cinco De Mayo” and bought me a Mexican sombrero to wear, and little paper Mexican flags to wave around. I’m Venezuelan. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML
Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML
Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML
Today, we had a substitute teacher. She was taking attendance and had trouble pronouncing my last name. When I corrected her, I heard her mutter under her breath about, “Goddamn Mexican immigrants…” I’m from Greek ancestry, born in the USA. FML
Today, I was hit in the head with a football during class. Spanish class. FML
Today, I invited my Peruvian girlfriend to my parent’s house for dinner. They decorated the house with Mexican flag and Fiesta lanyards, and bought Taco Bell. My girlfriend is vegetarian and had to explain to them that no, Peru is not a city in Mexico. It’s been 3 hours and she won’t pick up her calls. FML
Today, my friend was complaining about how she did not like Mexican food. Confused, I asked her whether she had even had Mexican food, to which she replied, “Yeah, I mean I’ve had Taco Bell.” FML
Today, after many hours studying a complete course of Spanish, I felt really good. I had accomplished something, something I could really use next week when I fly to Mexico on vacation. Then I found out what I had learned was Spanish as they speak it in Spain, not how they speak it in Latin America. FML
Today, my best friend planned a birthday party for me at the local Mexican restaurant. NO ONE showed up. We'd told the waiter there would be 18 arriving. Two hours later he brought me free ice cream. Even the non-English speaking waiters knew I was a loser. FML
Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML
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Top comments
Bogrbon 27
Hey, it could be worse. He's a clueless, ignorant racist, but at least he's a thoughtful, clueless, ignorant racist....
RichardPencil 32
That's pretty close, right? I mean, they speak Mexican in Venezuela, so it's understandable that would also celebrate Mexico's victory over the Galactic Empire -- pew-pew-pew!
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
That's pretty close, right? I mean, they speak Mexican in Venezuela, so it's understandable that would also celebrate Mexico's victory over the Galactic Empire -- pew-pew-pew!
mskeptik 12
It could have been worse if you were Ukrainian and a classmate bought you a Russian sombrero aka ushanka and wished you a "Happy Defender of the Fatherland Day".
RichardPencil 32
Back when it was the USSR, we called them all Russians. Oops.
Grumpy Jack 27
Or Soviets
Bogrbon 27
Hey, it could be worse. He's a clueless, ignorant racist, but at least he's a thoughtful, clueless, ignorant racist....