What are you not getting?

By fuck no! - 19/04/2020 23:00

Today, trying to be a little fun and flirty, I asked my husband if he wanted to play strip poker. He replied, "Nah. Not much fun with just two people." Not sure if he’s suggesting swinging or if he's really just that dense to what I wanted. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 576
You deserved it 229

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If he’s anything like my ex, the answer is “dense”.

Any chance he wasn't listening close enough & just heard poker? Really though, any kind of poker with just 2 people isn't great. If what you want is a strip tease related to a game, see if there's another game you can make work?

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If he’s anything like my ex, the answer is “dense”.

What's the prize? He's already seen you naked zillions of times. Why would he want it in slo-mo?

The prize is that if you engage is foreplay with your wife, she's more likely to want to have sex with you. So I guess if you never want to sleep with your wife again, turning down her sexual advances is a good idea.

It doesn't have to be all-or-nothing. Generally speaking, rejecting your wife's sexual advances has adverse effects. But if she wants to play a long game to draw out the experience, you can turn that down and suggest a more time-efficient foreplay.

If you want sex, be explicit. It's not that hard, pretending like this just makes it harder for everyone.

No it doesn't. That's part of the problem.

So a wife wanting some foreplay and seduction is "pretending" now? What's with all these dudes getting mad the woman isn't being "direct" enough? Sex isn't supposed to be a quick plumbing job you can check off your to-do list. There's a reason sex scenes in movies aren't just one person walking up to the other out of nowhere and saying "I would like to have sex now if you are available" followed by the most efficient means of accomplishing the act.

Depends on the movie. in Champagne for Breakfast, one woman said to another "I would love to eat the crotch out of your panties." Guess what happened next.

If that’s not explicit enough, you’re a lost cause!

He's dense, but you're not direct. Sounds like you both have problems

Most women do not think of sex in terms of "what's the quickest method to get his dick in my vagina." We're not playing some elaborate game of "oh, I want to just ask for sex but I'm going to be sneaky about it." OP was looking for flirty, sexy seduction and invited her man to particpate. She shouldn't have to hold up a sign saying "if you would engage with me in a titilating situation I will more likely grant you access to my genitalia." We're not playing games, we just don't cold start.

Do you know what he might get for his trouble? "Why do you always think it's about sex?". If you want sex be direct. If you want foreplay be direct. If you're not willing to be direct be patient and willing to be disappointed. It's that simple

Any chance he wasn't listening close enough & just heard poker? Really though, any kind of poker with just 2 people isn't great. If what you want is a strip tease related to a game, see if there's another game you can make work?