Wake Up Call By FML Approved - 07/10/2017 03:00 The most frustrating sound ever. I agree, your life sucks 463 You deserved it 87 Share Tweet Share
Today, I competed in a national championship for the sport that I play, and none of my family came to watch and support me. My wife, kids, parents, brothers and sisters - none of them. It was the only opportunity to see me compete, as I'm getting too old and have to stop now. Thanks for nothing, family. FML I agree, your life sucks 749 You deserved it 126
Today, I sent a forward to the ladies at my office. When I scrolled down I noticed my personal emails from my best friend were attached. They go into great detail about the sex I had last night, when I was planning on dumping my boyfriend, and that I suspected I had an anal fissure. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 742 You deserved it 61 353
Today, I went to lick the excess peanut butter off the knife after making a PB and J. Turns out the knife can and will cut your tongue, even though you don't think it will. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 763 You deserved it 62 518
Today, my fiancé said he’s now having second thoughts about us getting married, all because my ex contacted him and told him that our relationship had ended because I'd cheated on him. I was literally 15 years-old and I didn’t even have sex, I just made out with another boy. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 020 You deserved it 362
Today, my boss said to me: 'You know, our competitors are also hiring!' FML I agree, your life sucks 31 327 You deserved it 3 048
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML I agree, your life sucks 5 501 You deserved it 416
Today, while playing Mario Wonder on my Switch, I missed a very simple jump at the end of a level and in response, slammed my foot down, hard. Unfortunately, my foot collided with a loose beam on my desk, causing it to break. My dad found out and told my mom, and now they've taken away my Switch for the day. FML I agree, your life sucks 110 You deserved it 985
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 462 You deserved it 119
This is usually followed by the "plotting their demise knowing that you will never actually act on it" phase.