Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML
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Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML
Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML
Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML
Today, my stepson told his class that I beat his mommy. I did beat his mommy… in Pokémon. He left that detail out, and now his entire school is treating me like a monster. My wife thinks it's hilarious, and says it's her revenge for me winning. FML
Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me, even though I moved into my own flat to escape her. I told her 'my flat, my rules' so she tried to confiscate my Xbox because 'she’s the boss of me.' The look on her face as the cops took her away was worth the shouting match we’ll have when she makes bail. FML
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Top comments
d4m4s74 12
This would have been de perfect opportunity for the HiV gag. After kicking the kid off, when the mother starts screaming say "your son just bit me, and I'm HiV positive, and walk away bleeding all over the floor
The_Water_Ninja 9
kids these days... you would think they knew this information
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Comments (166)
randome101 12
You can get it for the wii though :3
Ins0mau 20
No shit?
Courts0001 11
Wii's are nintendo!!
county_kid 6
When he bites you hold his nose so he can't breath
Krystal3408 32
Wait you mean OP is standing there waiting for us to tell him/her what to do?
saulito51 7
That's self defense sue him for aggressivly biting you
SexPot143 13
That bitch should have controlled her little **** of a kid better. I'd of kicked him too. I wouldnt give a shit if he was 6, still old enough to know better than to bite. Sorry your manager is also such a douche OP for suspending you. Time to find a new job
godfathermock 19
I would sue the mom for having a dangerous kid who shouldn't be allowed in public.
Taurus_ChicKa 36
Oh that makes me so mad...I despise people like this. They don't discipline/control their own damn kids and then when the kid misbehaves in public, they act like it's everyone else's fault. That kid should have been taught long ago that biting is not okay. If he's old enough to play Pokemon, he's old enough to be taught what's acceptable behavior. OP, you should not have been reprimanded at all, in any way, shape, or form, and that mother should have her ass kicked...just like she should have done to her kid when he started biting. And seriously, an Xbox? How old is this kid? Kids are getting ahold of technology too easy these days, and with no discipline, it's no wonder they're all out of control. I should NOT see a seven-year-old walking around when an iPhone. Just...ugh!
NostalgiaFreak9 41
An Xbox is a gaming console. Kids play on gaming consoles. That's how he got ahold of one. Plus, the SNES and Sega Genesis were technology too, were they not? Just because those consoles didn't have the capabilities consoles today have, that doesn't mean only kids today are spoiled for owning gaming consoles today. A kid harassing their parents nonstop for an Xbox 360 is no different than a kid in the 90's constantly harassing their parents for a Sega Genesis, because in both scenarios, the kids are spoiled and whiny.
PhoenixMartinez 30
*Sega Megadrive
redstone7693 29
And that ladies and gentlemen, Is why stupid soccer moms should not visit video game stores.
blowtrees420 6
more time to game and smoke?
Infinity1337 11
Looks like the zombie apocalypse has begun.
buckdharma 37
Sounds like you got mauled by a wild animal.
Krystal3408 32
Kids ARE wild animals these days