Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML
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Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML
Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML
Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML
Today, my stepson told his class that I beat his mommy. I did beat his mommy… in Pokémon. He left that detail out, and now his entire school is treating me like a monster. My wife thinks it's hilarious, and says it's her revenge for me winning. FML
Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me, even though I moved into my own flat to escape her. I told her 'my flat, my rules' so she tried to confiscate my Xbox because 'she’s the boss of me.' The look on her face as the cops took her away was worth the shouting match we’ll have when she makes bail. FML
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Top comments
d4m4s74 12
This would have been de perfect opportunity for the HiV gag. After kicking the kid off, when the mother starts screaming say "your son just bit me, and I'm HiV positive, and walk away bleeding all over the floor
The_Water_Ninja 9
kids these days... you would think they knew this information
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Comments (166)
Trigabyte 8
Jesus Christ, why did I have to be born in a generation of idiots. I'm 13, and I deeply apologize for this kids behavior. I really hope he was around five or younger.
dogpup4 23
Don't worry, I doubt any 13 year old would do something like this haha. I'd say a maximum of about 8 or 9.
summerguy97 16
Hey dude, all generations are full of idiots, don't worry about it. The thing is, our idiots are louder, reaching all over the world with the Internet.
OneLegChase 5
The Zombie-self-defense excuse would seem to work here.
BlitzPKF 10
You know how it is now a days give a kid an Xbox and he thinks he knows the world...
Inkedldd 8
Get a rabies shot and fast.
Cowsxgoxmoo78 8
Reading this while watching the walking dead made it all that much better :-).
OverBlossomed 22
No generation is more stupid or spoiled than mine. *face palm* Then again, the next generation likely won't be much better.
NostalgiaFreak9 41
There were always idiots in the world. These days, they just get publicized on the internet.
wolfgold2 20
Wow, just wow.
AnimeBitch 14
The customer always bites..
avapaige1234 19
One thing I learned the hard way: Customers are always right.
LittleMagicWolf 7
How old is that kid to not know this????