Today, with my name sounding vaguely like 'Turkey' and being in the phonebook for business purposes, people keep calling, offering to stuff me for Thanksgiving. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went to work during Black Friday, after not being invited to my family's Thanksgiving dinner. FML
Today, Thanksgiving Day and I have no family to spend with, all my friends are busy or out of town, and the only person actively talking to me is a random guy on Bumble. FML
Today, my toilet broke. Yesterday, the shower filled up with sludge. I have ten people coming over for Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow. FML
Today, I'm stuck at my minimum wage job, listening to people who make twice as much as me complain that, "they only get the week off for Thanksgiving." FML
Today, I’m going to have two Thanksgivings. One at my parents' for the first half of the day, then the other at my house. I let my boyfriend know beforehand about it, as well as my sister. She then told my mom about my plan and next thing I know, I got a phone call from mom that turned into her yelling at me for not staying all day. FML
Today, I was in charge of Thanksgiving dinner. I dressed and stuffed the turkey, popped it in the oven and sent a mass text out to my family about how amazing it would be. Everyone arrived, we began making plates of food when I checked the turkey, and realized I never even turned on the oven. FML
Today, after being unemployed for over four months, I got a call from a company I've wanted to work for for over 2 years. After they were about to set up an interview, they called me by a different name. After correcting them, they hung up on me. Turns out they had the wrong number. FML
Today, it's Thanksgiving and I've spent the last few days imploring my husband not to antagonize my Trump-loving family by talking about the fact that they didn't look into what tariffs were at the time, and now they might have to close their business. Wish me luck… FML
Today, feeling festive, I sent everyone on my phone's contact list a holiday message. Almost everyone replied back "who's this?" FML
Today, at work, I took an order from a stuck-up sounding lady over the phone. She said her last name was "duckling, but with an F". Bemused, I wrote her name on the order. When she arrived to pick it up later, she told me she'd said "s", not "f". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dramaelf 37
I honestly saw a guy named Mickey Mouse in my local phonebook. You could have it a lot worse.
vcapelo 19
Don't chicken out and remove your number!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (87)
doodlebug33 20
Or "Number 16 Bus Shelter" :/
Brina17 3
Mark is that you?
glitterkuro 18
Last night my partner kept making jokes about stuffing me with sage and onion and I literally only just got why. (I got that he was referring to a turkey but as I'm British I totally didn't clock WHY). Uh, happy Thanksgiving.
WardenWolf 26
You should respond with, "Sorry, my <significant other> already did that."
a4s 8
They just want to stick their hand up ur arse
Forever1218 10
What's your name then?
imdabess 9
"I'll stuff you full tonight"
Gangsterrface 10
I really want to know your name...
UsernameTaken14 18
Is your name Tucker?
QU33NOFAWKWARD 16
What kind of name sounds like 'turkey'?
Epikouros 32
Torquay?