By love_to_live - 28/07/2012 04:17 - United States - Waupun
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Well, at least they are looking out for you. Ya got some thoughtful kids there.
You never got backhanded as a kid? Well, I still consider myself a child because I'm only fourteen, but if I'm out of line, my mom makes damn sure I know it. She was raised the same way. People don't think spanking or things like it work, so they don't do it. And that's why you have so many kids running around talking crap to elders and not having a filter because they weren't taught respect.
although I agree very slightly 41 you're also wrong because being smacked as a child (I don't mean beaten I mean slapped, like on the bottom or hand) can go either way. I know I've taken a few smacks from my mum and I've learnt from them but they can also cause kids to rebel. I'm 50/50 on teaching children through a slap or two, and like I said I mean on the hand not a black eye! also, I don't see how this is ops fault, some women genuinely don't realise they're mean a dick, I often get told I'm being nasty when really I think I'm being funny (I'm usually rather sarcastic but it doesn't come off that way when I'm going through that time of the month!)
I was raised with smacks and such and I'm not very obedient. >:) Meanwhile, my friend, whose parents would never lay a hand on her, is terrified of breaking rules or getting them mad. I don't think smacking has anything to do with whether your kid is disciplined; it's way more psychological and social than that. You can definitely be forceful and discipline children with just words.
41-I'm not against spanking but I would never smack my child across the face. You are degrading them while doing that and children need to be brought up In a positive light. My mother wasn't much in the spankings, but let her lift those baby blue eyes of hers in the air and I straightened my ass up real quick. Spanking should be a last minute resort!
I agree with 71. Spanking, as in on the bottom , should only be done as a last resort when a child is misbehaving. I was threatened with a belt once when I was little but it never came to actually being spanked because I knew I had to straighten up before my bum got hurt! I don't think I would ever really spank my kids, unless it came to having to do the last thing on the list.
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Actually #6, I grew up during a time when a child who openly disrespected their parents got slapped. Hence why I respect my elders, unlike most of today's youth. So yes, if my own child publicly disrespected me that way, I would smack her. Nowadays that is considered child abuse, but when I was a child a parent was considered neglectful if they didn't discipline their kids. If you need a reason why, go to the mall and look around. Go to the grocery store and listen to teenagers and their parents.
Um... You're 23, you're not that far out of your teens yourself and very in the age range of when spanking was already frowned upon... I agree with you that most of the upcoming generation deserves a slap or two, however you're still pretty much in their generation yourself.
Just because she's in the age group doesn't mean her parents didn't discipline her... I'm 17 and my parents sure as hell slapped me if I was being bratty and disrespectful. I'm just guessing it's really the parents' decision if they want to go with the social flow or not.
don't u think hitting them is overdoing it? not like she's publicly humiliated by her kids or anything. i'm 18 and i grew up with strict rules and very well disciplined. but it seems like the kids just want to lighten things up a bit by cracking up a joke or two.
Dude I got slapped for being rude or doing anything disrespectful. I never looked at as abuse. In fact it teaches you...fast. Not to be scared of it, but teaches you right from wrong. The slap or spanks memory will remind you of what you did wrong n know not to do it. I love the hell outa my mom. But I guess certain parents take it too far n do it for other reasons.. Just need to filter our thë good n bad side of this.
27 - it all depends on the kids and how they meant it tbh... If it was a young child then I wouldn't hit them for it as they were just speaking what they thought with true honest (and innocent) observation... However if it were an older child that had said it to be sassy or a smart ass then sure a slap would be in order tbh as a parent isn't a friend that you should be mocking like that and should be shown a bit more respect than that.
Spanking only ever got violence and resentment out of me. Only good it did was teach me my family couldn't be trusted and the best thing to do was avoid them at all cost. I only respect those who respect me or deserve respect. Any one who harms me, makes me cry or gets mad at me for being me doesn't deserve respect.
I personally agree with spanking. Admittedly my father took it to the point of abuse, and went for pure pain rather than a lesson learned. He spanked me, waited a few seconds for the pain, spanked me again. He did that up to five times. Back handed me in an elevator(while my friends were around) when I merely asked for permission to go to the pool with friends. He said no, so as any kid would do I said 'awww dad! Please! I will do more housework to earn it!' he pretty much made me see stars, for 'disrespecting' him. My mom on the other hand, she explained it, went for using the spankings to teach lessons, explained what I did wrong, that it was disappointment. I cried because I felt bad for upsetting her. Not because of pain. Today; I hate my father. I love my mother. There is a difference between abuse and discipline. On that note! I think depending on how these kids act normally, they may just need to be told that saying things like that hurts people's feelings. But, if it's a common occurrence of their disrespect, then go for it!
In my opinion, hitting a child gets you no where. For example 2 days ago my nephew, the baby laying on me in my profile pic, started throwing a tantrum because he wanted jelly beans before dinner. My dad kept threatening to hit him but my mom kept trying to calm him down. He was just tired just like most kids are when they throw a tantrum. My dad screaming about hitting him did nothing to stop him. My mom calming him down did stop him though. As for the kids in this FML, depending on their age they might not know that what they said is disrespectful,
64- Know why it doesn't work? He's a baby. If you're under four, no. You won't get it. But my mom told me I'm never too old for a spanking, as long as I'm in her house. I think it should start around five or six so they understand the consequences better.
I was never spanked or hit as a child. I still have grown up to be a respectful, caring person. I try and help others whenever I can and do not talk back to my elders. My parents taught me to not step out of line without physically hurting me. So I didn't step out of line. I have a fantastic relationship with both my parents now. I regard them as both my friends and authority. I can go to them with any problem. Meanwhile, a friend of mine was spanked as a child. She has a lot of problems now (and I'm not saying her issues are all related to spanking). However, I do know that she has a dreadful relationship with her parents now and lives in fear of them. She never discusses her problems with them; they never even knew she had an eating disorder. Talk about all bonds of a healthy relationship getting broken. True, she is just as respectful as I am. Yet the necessary relationship every child needs with his or her guardian was lost. Sorry for my long story. I just thought it would be good to hear an alternative example.
#7 I wholeheartedly agree. I'm 27 and even as such I respect people in general because of the discipline I received as a brat, err I mean child. I was a nightmare but yet I'm a professional, well educated being helping his fellow neighbour and respecting authority.....when appropriate.
Guys, whether spanking/hitting/slapping has any effect or not depends on the child. We're all raised differently. I grew up respecting my parents by getting a belt to the ass, unlike my younger brother who is 13 and STILL annoys the shit out of them. It gets to the point where I'm amazed they don't beat him senseless. I think giving him a few hits would put him straight, but they never do it, so he continues to be annoying as fuck.
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Wow, I feel sorry for you. Your kids sound horrific, you should do something about that though. It's disrespectful on so many levels. If you didn't punish them or say anything you've let them off far too easy. You have to put your foot down if you don't want your kids treating you like that.
I disagree, children say what they are thinking. A lot of children would not understand why that would be considered 'disrespectful'. In the child's mind they are speaking of what they observe. If they have learned that mommy gets cranky certain times a month and mommy buys tampons to 'fix that', then they are speaking from experience. She should calmly explain to them that no, she doesn't need tampons to fix her mood. She is just upset today. Then she should work on her attitude.
13 It depends on the age. Some kids can't be reasoned with, and some are just venomous and disrespectful. Some may just be communicating but even if that were true the intent isn't any better. And I'm guessing if she was cranky, her kids are probably part of it.
Her kids' comment really didn't come off as disrespectful to me, but rather funny for its hint of truth. Regardless of age, why should it be so wrong for a child to tease his/her mother? Needless to say, I don't know their family dynamic, but it isn't fair to assume that it was coming from a malicious place.
We should physically punish our children for voicing their observations? Wowzers. That seems like a horrible way to raise children. Perhaps the better route is to explain to the child that what they said was rude and encourage them to be more tactful in the future, rather than just jumping straight to corporal punishment?
At least they didn't bring a box of tampons in for their teacher on a bad day. :P