Animals and Kids: Today, while I was at work, my kids had the great idea to make...

By ChocolateEverywhere - 23/03/2017 00:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, while I was at work, my kids had the great idea to make chocolate milk. My husband had the great idea not to clean up the chocolate mix the kids spilled, so the floor got covered in chocolate footprints. The cat then had the great idea to step in the mix, and cover everything else in chocolate paw prints. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 790

You deserved it 485

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Same thing different taste

Funtime!

By kengu - 23/10/2011 21:02 - Norway

Today, I mopped all the floors in my house. When I was finally done, I accidentally knocked over an open bottle of soda. My cats took this as a perfect opportunity to chase each other around, step in the soda, and track sticky paw prints everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 632

You deserved it 7 129

By Livingthedream - 12/08/2018 06:00

Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 950

You deserved it 467

By Nylo - 29/01/2018 01:30

Today, I made my first ever chocolate fudge, which turned out really nice. I had a bite and left it on the counter with plastic wrap covering, only to come back later to find my sister's cat pissing on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 182

You deserved it 548

By Anonymous - 27/04/2012 15:22 - United States - Pleasant Hill

Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 313

You deserved it 2 576

Chocolate chip

By Anonymous - 29/11/2019 14:00

Today, I was eating chocolate chip cookies around the house and saw a chocolate chip on the floor. Not wanting my dog to eat it, given that chocolate is poisonous for dogs, I swiped it up with my finger and put it to my mouth. It was then that I realized it was a stub of my dog's poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 941

You deserved it 2 883

Cute but messy

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 00:00

Today, my kids made a mess in the kitchen while trying to make breakfast in bed for me. The mess was bigger than the breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 207

By Barney - 18/06/2011 16:10 - United States

Today, I painted my daughter's bedroom. When I wasn't paying attention, the cat walked through the paint tray. There are now Barney purple paw prints all over the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 846

You deserved it 9 158

Con Artist Kitty

By Tray - 25/09/2017 20:13

Today, I had just finished making myself an ice cream cone when my cat puked all over the floor. I set my cone on the counter while I cleaned up, and when I finished, my cat was licking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 870

You deserved it 624

By Evjoel - 28/06/2016 10:34 - Bermuda - Hamilton

Today, whilst making a cake for my kids, I accidentally got some cocoa powder in my nose. Now it feels like my nose is burning stronger than the fires of hell. On the bright side, everything smells like chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 663

You deserved it 1 104

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 115

You deserved it 144

jasonrellet 22

Wednesday 22 March 2017 14:06

This seems like it could be out of a movie! Or a cleaning product commercial! Sorry OP FYL

Thor1012 28

Wednesday 22 March 2017 14:30

I'd be so mad. Be filling a bucket and handing him the mop and the kids should join

Comments

jasonrellet 22

Wednesday 22 March 2017 14:06

This seems like it could be out of a movie! Or a cleaning product commercial! Sorry OP FYL

Thor1012 28

Wednesday 22 March 2017 14:30

I'd be so mad. Be filling a bucket and handing him the mop and the kids should join

sjattiepoo 1

Wednesday 22 March 2017 15:51

Apperently a lot of good ideas

StarkWolf_fml 23

Wednesday 22 March 2017 18:46

Bounty ultra soft can clean up any mess your kids make & you only use one tissue

Uniquestar7 20

Wednesday 22 March 2017 18:53

It was then your turn to have a great idea-make him clean up anyway!

mcruff 12

Wednesday 22 March 2017 20:06

This sounds like something that Lynette from Desperate Housewives would talk about

StealthySky 5

Wednesday 22 March 2017 22:24

I hope you made your husband and children clean the mess up.

AcieMcG 21

Sunday 2 April 2017 13:13

This is how you get ants.

Keywords

Dentist Ironic Health Coworkers Work Annoying Relatable Grandparents Awkward Miscellaneous Food Love Insects Public freakouts Fear Animals Bullying Family Suspicious Relationship advice Embarrassing Neighbours Anniversary AITA Gamers Cooking Vegan Allergies Sex Intimacy

The Top

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 597

You deserved it 4 589

Today, after my wife’s father made a very weird joke the other day, and it completely bothered me and caused my anxiety to skyrocket, I asked her about it. She told me not to worry and that it’s just a joke. I’ve always suspected he views his daughter, my wife, sexually. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 100

The Top

Today, I was sitting on the back porch with my husband. I felt two raindrops land on my head, so I said we should go inside because it was starting to rain. It turned out to just be a bird shitting on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 997

You deserved it 99

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 002

You deserved it 10 458

Today, I found out that the last girl from my graduating high school class is engaged to her boyfriend. I'm now the only guy from high school who's still single and I'm not even 30 yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 288

Today, I tried to get over my childhood phobia of syringes by donating blood. The phlebotomist hadn't even touched the needle before I started sobbing hysterically. They made me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 609

You deserved it 13 762

Today, my boyfriend and I are still fighting over the fact I haven't told my overprotective, bipolar, narcissist father about us, after a month together. Neither of us wants to break up, but we can't come to a compromise either. Dating is hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 778

You deserved it 270

Today, I got home from my holidays to find my flatmate has moved his girlfriend in without asking me. Not only does she walk around naked, she has also redecorated the rooms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 623

You deserved it 4 121