Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML
Today, during my work shift, my car got stolen and I had to walk home on the rain. While I was walking home, my stolen car drove by. FML
Today, I arrived to work at exactly 8 so I could leave at exactly 5, without overtime. I found out later that my brother took my keys with him somewhere and now I can't enter the house until he gets back at 11. FML
Today, I returned home from a 2-day trip. Before I left, I told my brother to move my car across the street when the street cleaner passes by. Turns out, he used all my gas and got so wasted he forgot to move my car. I got a big ticket that he said he'd pay for. He's unemployed and lives off me. FML
Today, I drove to return a PC that my former company lent me to work at home, because I quit that job so won't be working there anymore. On my way to the office, I was robbed of both my car and the computer. FML
Today, as usual, I work nights and sleep during the day. I found out that my brother uses my car and never puts gas in it when he called me for the first time to actually ask me if he could borrow my car, and also to lend him $20 to put gas in it. FML
Today, I was finally able to drive my brother's nice car instead of my clunker, because he left for college. First thing I do? Back into the neighbors' mailbox while exiting the driveway. FML
Today, after getting booked off work for being sick, I go to work anyway. On the way home, I stop by a colleagues fairwell, being the paranoid type of guy I make sure my car is locked about 3-4 times and head in. Later I get home to find my laptop has been stolen from my boot with my medication. FML
Today, I got locked out of a building that I work in (I work night shifts). I locked my phone, wallet, and car keys in the building. I had no way of contacting my boss or getting a ride. I had to walk home at night, almost got hit by a car full of dudes yelling slurs, and had a woman scream at me from the passenger seat of a car. FML
Today, my family and I drove to a mall an hour away. We split up, and I went into a store by myself. A little later, I get a call from my brother asking me where I am. They had already left to go home and didn't notice me missing from the car. They were already halfway home. FML
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Top comments
animerose08 6
thats when I'd call the cops and report both my purse and car stolen. If my brother did that w/o my knowledge, I'd be pissed! I hope you didn't have to walk too far. I hope you kicked his ass when you saw him! LoL
ilovejeland 0
soo did you walk??? btw you should bring the cops home with you to scare the shitt out of him. then have him arrested..haha
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Comments (82)
gremlin87 0
how did he get your keys? and it sounds to me like your purse and everything were in your car... Why would you leave your purse in the car?! Well, I guess you won't be doing that again.
imright24 0
YDI on so many levels. Never leave valuables in your vehicle. Never give your keys to someone else.
littlexlion 4
Yeah... I wouldn't leave your purse, phone, or anything valuable in your car... however, I actually I might see how the brother has the keys. I gave a copy of my car key to my sister in case she needs my car in an absolute emergency. Though, I know my sister wouldn't pull a bitch move :o
jaybird9 0
oh I'd kick his butt lol
AmbrosiaFan 19
How exactly did he get your keys, your money, your phone, your purse?? Lesson learned hopefully.
MakkaCha 0
I shouldn't but I LOL'd really hard. Sorry, but i hope you got a ride back home from your co-worker or atleast borrowed some money from them to take a taxi or something. And next time don't give him the keys. Or if it is a family shared car than hide his keys.
EvilDave 13
@OP report the car stolen and see if he learns his lesson. Of course, you will need to press the charges.
iloveurmother 0
why would you leave your purse in the car? ydi
marc_with_a_c 3
And why exactly does he have your keys? And who the hell leaves his/her money/phone/purse in their car? Where do you put YOUR keys? In your pockets? Isn't that what the purse is for? Shouldn't you carry the purse with you inside your work place, so you have your keys to unlock the car doors after work? Or are you just stupid and leave them unlocked all the time, with your keys inside your purse inside? No wonder your brother took off with your car, but hey you're lucky, it was just your brother, could have been a thief! No matter what reasons you come up with, it looks like it's totally your fault, either because you gave him your keys, or you left yours in the car. Sucks to be you.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
I posted this above but I'll say it again. I don't know if such is the case with the OP but I know that in my house everyone has access to spare copies of all the car keys in case one of the cars needs to be moved and it's owner is unavailable. The point being that perhaps the OP didn't hand over the keys, maybe the brother had a spare set. As for the why her purse might be in the car, maybe she couldn't bring it in to work. I had a job once where the manager locked everyone out of the break room because of a couple idiots leaving it a mess, so we couldn't use the lockers. He also wouldn't let us keep our purses, coats, or phones with us while we were working so a lot of people had to leave their stuff in their cars or a friend's car.
GooberNater 0
wonder what the backstory is? I bet five bucks the brother did it in retribution for something Op did heinous.