Intimacy: Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon...

By SoClose - 03/02/2009 14:25 - Canada

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 870

You deserved it 5 500

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By tired - 16/01/2013 19:02 - United States - Boston

Today, I walked up sixteen flights of stairs to my room to avoid the lift lines. When I was almost at the top, the fire alarm sounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 586

You deserved it 3 797

Weewooweewoo

By Anonymous - 19/09/2010 05:38 - United States

Today, I accidentally bumped into the fire alarm which set off a high pitched buzzing noise that could be heard throughout the entire dorm. It went on for at least two hours and none of the technicians could figure out how to turn it off. All the girls on my floor are mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 018

You deserved it 7 061

Fire!

By Mel Cluze - 22/10/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were spending the night at a hotel. We were awoken at 3 a.m. by the fire alarm. We quickly got dressed, went down the stairs to the reception area… and were told that it was a false alarm. All because some jerk lit a cigarette in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 161

Send help

By Virginy - 01/11/2014 01:26 - France

Today, I got stuck in my building's elevator. I pushed the emergency button, which made a ringing noise. After about half an hour, I heard someone yell, "Stop pushing that button, my kids are sleeping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 857

You deserved it 2 615

By Jerf - 24/06/2009 00:56 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on, and listening to loud music when she suddenly looked worried and asked if I heard something. I said no and continued. Moments later, three firemen opened the bedroom door and told us to get dressed and go outside because the building was on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 918

You deserved it 9 807

Awkward

By rawrrrr - 17/03/2010 04:01 - United States

Today, after a fire alarm went off, everyone was going back into the building. I had never gone up the stairs before because I live on the 9th floor. As everybody was going back inside, I followed some guys right into their suite on the 1st floor, thinking it was the way to the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 982

You deserved it 29 469

By random875 - 07/01/2015 06:03 - United States - Owings Mills

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. I called the fire department and told them where I was. They said they'd be right there and not to panic. It's hour 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 301

You deserved it 2 485

Caught in 4K

By Anonymous - 06/11/2011 00:04 - Reserved

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 41 023

By smyp - 27/08/2015 08:23 - Lithuania

Today, I was going down the elevator in my dorm and a friend joined on another floor. He then thought it was a good time to tell me that he slept with my girlfriend when the elevator got stuck. Worst 40 minutes of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 703

You deserved it 1 615

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 972

You deserved it 12 963

tishytot 0

Saturday 7 February 2009 4:40

Dude. You just got cockblocked by a fire alarm. Ferreal, **** your life.

sarcasm_isme 8

Tuesday 3 March 2009 21:38

honestly, i think the girls pulled the fire alarm. girls are mean like that. it was probably a joke.

Comments

brownrug 0

Wednesday 4 February 2009 2:04

denied =(

tishytot 0

Saturday 7 February 2009 4:40

Dude. You just got cockblocked by a fire alarm. Ferreal, **** your life.

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 6:13

the most epic FML i've read so far wow just wow

hopelessly_dense 0

Monday 9 February 2009 8:49

and I thought i knew how to cockblock

flyingdjs 0

Wednesday 11 February 2009 3:13

sssssssssaaaaaaaaaaadddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

yougotboyed 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 23:12

perhaps the saddest story i have ever heard.

dont_stop_believ 0

Monday 14 June 2010 0:48

dude there r dying children who never see day and this is the saddest story you ever heard??

americuzz 8

Sunday 25 July 2010 1:00

yes this I sad he didn't deserve it. fyl op.

gars56 5

Tuesday 2 October 2012 0:47

What do you mean by never see day? I'm intrigued by this

sarcasm_isme 8

Tuesday 3 March 2009 21:38

honestly, i think the girls pulled the fire alarm. girls are mean like that. it was probably a joke.

whoperlargefries 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 1:28

thats what i was thinking too. i can't believe it took until post #21 for someone to realize that :P

iamf___d 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 19:01

here is a tip next time just take the stairs it is worth it

stolencookie 17

Wednesday 24 July 2013 4:14

Stairs have nothing to do with fire alarms going off... You would still need to evacuate the building all the same while exerting more energy.

throwing_bricks 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 2:05

:( dude

Mikieboy 0

Friday 13 March 2009 10:36

No. Nohahaaooooo, ah man. **** haahhahhahahaha, thats terrible, it was prolly a jealous homie pullin the alarm, duuuhuuuude, major weakage

minesbiggerr 25

Saturday 1 February 2014 21:08

Weakage?

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, it's day one of my suspension and probably being fired from my job. Why? I accidentally took a beer out my bag instead of a soda, then got distracted working to make sure everything got done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 535

Today, I have an HR meeting to discuss my team's performance. This is the same HR that refuses to hire more people because my department is full. The same HR that complains when tasks are completed late due to the team being overworked, yet refuses to take any suggestions. How do you give feedback to people like this? FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 74

The Top

Today, it's the last day of finals week. Unfortunately the only test I've passed this week is the pregnancy test I took during my lunch break in a Subway bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 042

You deserved it 49 305

Today, I had sex with my landlord. As if that's not bad enough, my period hit, and I bled everywhere. His place is a total bloodbath and I'm worried that he's going to ask me to pay for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 1 227

Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 151

You deserved it 2 495

Today, I realized I had misspelled "Education" on all the resumes I've been submitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 094

You deserved it 53 013

Today, my abusive mom just moved into my house, within two weeks of me losing my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 132

Today, I made it onto my boss's shit-list, after pointing out that he'd misspelled "customer" as "costumer" 6 times in his report, and "college education" as "collage education" twice. It'd be a dick move on his part even if making corrections like this weren't part of my damn job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 044

You deserved it 1 717