By Poopamus - 23/04/2019 14:00

Today, the police showed up at my door asking if I told this creepy guy stalking my girlfriend that I'll chop him up and bury each piece in a different country if he doesn't stop bothering my girl. I told them I did, along with an explanation. Turns out, he's been missing since that day. FML
I agree, your life sucks 3 165
You deserved it 600

Same thing different taste

Top comments

colderthanyou 15

Guess who’s a number one suspect!? I know it’s tempting to threaten those shitty people, but you just can’t for this very reason. I do hope there is a follow up for this one though

Comments

colderthanyou 15

Guess who’s a number one suspect!? I know it’s tempting to threaten those shitty people, but you just can’t for this very reason. I do hope there is a follow up for this one though

Did you expect the threat to have no consequences? It’s 2019, someone will call the police over a car alarm.

donthatemebut 14

And the #1 suspect of the case is named Poopamus

Maybe he took your threat seriously. Or maybe you followed through with it. *squints suspiciously*

Sounds like a fun Carmen Sandiego episode. You leading the cops to various exotic countries to show them where you buried body parts.

Imagine having to travel halfway around the world just to find some dead guy's junk.

Probably took off after telling someone about the threat to screw with you. And I wouldn’t take that possibility lightly.

queenwolfblood 8

that's why the cops ask you something you always ask why before you give an answer.

*detective hat* So if he's missing since the day you threatened him, who told the police? Or were you smart enough to yell at him in front of people?