Love: Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body....

By pugs - 29/01/2010 08:43 - France

Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body. I said "Thin an toned but curvy in all the right places." I then asked her the same question to which she replied, "I don't know, you know I'm always drunk when we're together." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 462

You deserved it 4 620

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By ak. - 02/03/2009 21:26 - United States

Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 691

You deserved it 11 367

Mr Romantic

By Mellon - 09/12/2021 01:59

Today, I was doubting my boyfriend's feelings for me, so I asked him if he found me attractive. He replied, "Well, you're thin enough…" That's all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 191

Backhanded

By johnny - 05/06/2023 22:00 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of a certain plus-sized vocalist, to which she replied, "She's gorgeous!" I said, "That's great because you remind me a lot of her." Now she's not talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 848

By the-yao - 24/01/2009 14:53 - United States

Today, someone told me they liked my personality when I'm drunk. I asked, "What about when I'm sober?". "No, only when you're drinking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 895

You deserved it 3 809

By Bad Dancer - 05/07/2015 01:48 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, my friend and I went to a club. She said I look hilarious when I dance drunk. I was completely sober. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 030

You deserved it 3 521

By Sam - 03/02/2009 22:38 - United States

Today, I showed my boyfriend a picture of me in what I thought was a sexy skintight dress. He responded by saying "it's ok, I went through a pudgy stage too". The picture was from Saturday night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 631

You deserved it 4 289

By IntimidatorStag - 06/02/2009 23:54 - United States

Today, I gave my girlfriend some non-alcoholic beer as a joke. In slurred speech, she told me I have the body of a monk seal. She then took my keys, staggered to my car, and drove away. She crashed into a tree two blocks later. She's fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 335

You deserved it 30 551

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 923

You deserved it 38 531

By Anonymous - 08/01/2010 15:09 - Canada

Today, I saw a picture of me from a night of drinking that surprisingly looked really really good. I showed my boyfriend and he agreed with me. Then he added, "What's funny is it looks nothing like you!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 945

You deserved it 3 734

By Anonyme - 22/06/2016 05:15 - Switzerland - Geneve

Today, I was trying to seduce a really good-looking girl, when all of a sudden she leaned in towards me and said, “Sorry, I’m not drunk enough to make out with you.“ FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 744

You deserved it 3 401

pidri 0

Friday 29 January 2010 16:19

doesn't sound like ur dating her sounds like she's using you for ass.

MoonyIce 0

Friday 29 January 2010 16:15

... Wow. Classy.

Comments

goof4 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 7:34

hey fags you all are stegosaurus's

EveryDayJackAss 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 8:53

i guess she officially made you her bitch

goldfishsweetie 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 18:45

wow that's rediculous... that must really suck..

13__Loki__13 1

Saturday 30 January 2010 20:25

Drunk girls love kinky sex and making pornos .... when they're passed out. I see a new cash making opportunity cumming your way

ForgottenBruno 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 23:12

that's funny shit

Poepiepiesie 3

Monday 23 August 2010 1:56

Curvier then a racetrack?

greyzero 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 1:38

You shouldn't date girls who drink more then you do, and go on at least 3 dates sober if you drink a lot, just to make sure you aren't wearing beer goggles.