Today, the creepy guy I turned down for a date almost six years ago, sent me a box of rotting flowers with a note calling me a cunt. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was told what a bitch I am for turning down “the nice guy” after he surprised me with flowers and a hand painted portrait. He conveniently left out the part where he texted me multiple creepy porn links, doesn’t brush his teeth and has the personal hygiene of a farm animal! FML
Today, at work, I received flowers from a Tinder fling gone wrong. He constantly flipped out on me and then would apologize. I finally got tired of it and blocked him on all social media. The scary part is that I never told him where I work. FML
Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "Ha! When losers send you flowers." FML
Today, I found garbage in my postbox. In amongst the garbage, I found a note saying ''This is all you ever will get. Stay away from me!'', from the girl I sent a love poem to the other day. FML
Today, I woke up to a guy outside my house, who wanted to give me flowers and take me out on a date. Aside from it all being pretty fucking creepy anyway, the guy is my not quite right in the head second cousin, who's apparently now head-over-heels in love with me. FML
Today, I received a note from my creepy ex, whom I broke up with two years ago, saying how much he still misses me. I live over 100 miles away from him now. The note was hand-delivered to my new address. FML
Today, the only person who remembered my birthday was my stalker ex. He left condoms, birth control, furry handcuffs, and a lingerie set in my mailbox, with a note saying to prepare for our anniversary. We went out for a week. In sixth grade. FML
Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
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Top comments
AustinDenton 22
Ahh. The signs of true love.
Nightwing98 22
He remembered you six years later....it's the thought that counts?
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Comments (92)
ohSNAPyall 27
Sounds like you missed out on a charming, stable fellow.
lessleemc 3
crazy stalker much.
i_luv_dogs 10
Was his name by any chance Mike Hunt?
Crazynocatlady 22
Seems like he just **** get over you.
Luigi2012SM64DS 6
Was his name Mike Hunt?
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Put no longer a resident on it and return to sender still sealed like you never you got it. That'll eat at the little pissant for another 6 years. You turned him down for a good reason obviously.
jamaicandog 3
Unless he turned out really successful and he rubbed it in if not then he's creepy as hell
TopHatNinja68 6
I think tht it got really lost in transit
Nasher86 8
Probably the same flowers from 6 years ago!
sexstorys 8
When u see him walk up to him sexy like and wisper in his ear **** off and as u walk away give him the finger