Intimacy: Today, right after sex, my girlfriend apologized to the neighbor... - FML

By AirOne - 12/11/2008 14:39 - United States

Spicy

Today, right after sex, my girlfriend apologized to the neighbor for the screaming. He thanked her for the entertainment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 679

You deserved it 10 831

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Same thing different taste

Keep it down

By lukas - 11/01/2014 00:24 - Canada - Lyndhurst

Spicy

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 025

You deserved it 8 496

By TooLoud - 31/05/2015 00:12 - United States - Moorpark

Spicy

Today, I got a text from my neighbor complaining about my girlfriend and me being too noisy in bed. I'm at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 114

You deserved it 3 005

Routine

By youaresodumb - 27/09/2010 04:19 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 449

You deserved it 34 359

Can't wait for the next time

By cowboy_gold - 25/01/2020 05:00

Spicy

Today, I came back to my dorm only to hear my neighbor having loud sex. I thought I was just thinking when I said, "At least do it against the other wall," but when I was left later on, he walked by, apologized and said that he thought I wasn't home, and promised to be more quiet next time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 119

You deserved it 565

By AussieG75 - 21/07/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Augustine

Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 391

You deserved it 2 552

By anon - 15/09/2012 05:35 - United States - Rocklin

Spicy

Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 435

You deserved it 2 729

Nice

By Username - 07/08/2011 08:08 - Reserved

Spicy

Today, after being kept awake all night by my house-mate and his girlfriend, they woke me at the crack of dawn to apologize for being so loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 376

You deserved it 2 615

Get it on

By kmb04 - 02/08/2009 15:12 - Canada

Spicy

Today, after a great night of sexual ecstacy, I ran to answer the door. The angry woman standing there introduced herself. ''Hi, I'm your neighbor. My seven year-old son's bedroom is just next to yours and when you scream at night, he gets scared. Do you think you could keep it down?'' FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 385

You deserved it 34 307

Scolded

By oopsies - 08/01/2010 01:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 054

You deserved it 5 469

By screamer - 02/09/2012 06:41 - United States - Paso Robles

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 957

You deserved it 38 512

Next

Top comments

ThorsSon 0

Monday 9 March 2009 19:31

Dude... you are getting laid... your woman is obviously enjoying it... she is not ashamed of it... and your neighbor is cool with it? If these are bad things for you, I will gladly come fill in for you.

ZleveL 0

Tuesday 1 June 2010 7:45

umm you are #9

Comments

mizled 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 9:59

sounds fun. xD

nwater 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 15:44

That's funny as hell!!! You should be proud not FML you selfish depressed prick

Boomi 38

Wednesday 14 September 2016 17:22

What's wrong with you?

liaotin 0

Sunday 8 March 2009 6:48

...God, number 9, was that called for? Anyway, you have cool neighbors.

ZleveL 0

Tuesday 1 June 2010 7:45

umm you are #9

DisappearingRose 18

Thursday 19 August 2010 20:21

they probably meant #8

ThorsSon 0

Monday 9 March 2009 19:31

Dude... you are getting laid... your woman is obviously enjoying it... she is not ashamed of it... and your neighbor is cool with it? If these are bad things for you, I will gladly come fill in for you.

domolovesyoshi 33

Wednesday 14 May 2014 5:20

I think the FML lies in the fact that he thinks the neighbour is getting off on listening to them have sex

cshippee_8750 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 17:08

Why is this a FML? it sounds like you're pretty good and neihbor is awesome

djtelekinesis 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 6:42

Dude, this is a FTW, not an FML.

Empleh 4

Sunday 5 April 2009 8:10

Still waiting on the FML. That is a good thing bro.

Jackthestripper 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 7:17

Nice work.

miss_creecy 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 11:38

haha, nice, even the neighbours are enjoying it! you must be doing an excellent job.

Sportsfreak2034 0

Monday 20 April 2009 21:44

creeper! haha

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Bosses Capitalism Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 886

You deserved it 61 114

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 519

The Top

Today, my wife has initiated sex less than five times in the 18 years we've been married. If I don't mention it, then she doesn't have to bother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 145

You deserved it 242

Today, I was outside with a guy I really like. He asked me to lay down on the ground and watch the stars with him. I did. Suddenly, he got up, walked over to another girl and kissed her. They left me there on the soaking wet ground, watching the stars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 407

You deserved it 3 916

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 736

You deserved it 4 864

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 795

You deserved it 12 485

Today, I was helping a 93 year-old hoarder organize her home. She asked me to make ropes from old plastic bags, fold bags in a specific odd way, then fit four large boxes of bags into one smaller one. I said I couldn't do those, nor fit four boxes in one. "Why are you here if you can’t do things?" she said. I’m a professional home organizer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 323

Today, my mother worked out that my boyfriend and I are having sex. Instead of confronting me about it, she now just sits and stares at me judgmentally whenever I'm in the same room as her, making me feel incredibly uncomfortable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 341

You deserved it 6 971