Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had a bunch of parties while my parents were out of town. I made sure to clean up absolutely everything, I even vacuumed the stairs. As they pulled up, I noticed all of the trash bags filled with beer cans blocking their way into the garage. FML
Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML
Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML
Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML
Today, my parents got back from their weekend ski trip. I had a few parties over the weekend and had cleaned up absolutely EVERYTHING; beer cans, throw up, spilled drinks, etc. The only thing I forgot about was the condom someone left in my parents bed. FML
Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML
Today, it was my 21st birthday and I invited a handful of my best friends over. They all stood me up and I drank alone in my apartment. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I held a house party. For fun, I made sure all the beer was alcohol-free, so I could see which of my friends would be weak-minded enough to end up acting drunk. Three did. I was one of them. FML
Today, everyone at work was demanding I stage a party at my house. I agreed to it and rushed home to tidy up before the guests arrived. No one showed up. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
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Top comments
JumbledGirl 2
Aww.... You forgot to break things...
natsaysheyyy 16
Uhhm... No one puts up party decorations for an actual party...
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Comments (190)
caligirlrose 1
The irony in that.
emmyl12 0
Red solo cup
jackhammerman 4
you just made my day
emmyjayyay 7
Pretty sure have seen this post before
BLBrian 0
Who crushes red cups? You crush beer cans. What a loser for thinking that.
neonglostix 28
You could have spent the same amount o time you wasted throwing a fake party on making some real friends. Just saying.
deransc 19
Don't pretend to be something you're not. And to hell what other people think anyway just be yourself
TcheQ 12
Why do you have a desperate need to impress people you clearly despise? I realise this is 5 months late, hope you haven't suicided yet.
Spring2013Bio 3
In all that time you wasted, you could have gone somewhere and enjoyed yourself (like a cafe, library, social event etc.)
justindrew14 29
this is why ur never get to go to any partys