Today, my mom has forbidden me from drinking skim milk, because my sister is upset that I'm skinnier than her. The same sister who refuses to drink any other milk than 2% chocolate. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom claimed that lactose intolerance is a "myth" and told me to drink my damn milk because it's good for my bones. FML
Today, my mom complained that I never do anything nice for her, so while out shopping I bought her favorite chocolate bar. When I got home, she screamed at me because she’s on a diet. FML
Today, my sister was concerned that her daughter (my niece) was sick, and hesitant to take her to the ER. I asked if she'd eaten something she shouldn't have, and she replied, "No, especially since we feed her the most healthy food we can." This was fine until I flipped out when she said, "We even give her raw milk so that she'll be strong." FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today, my mother offered me some chocolate milk. I took a few gulps before I realized the label said it was raw unpasteurized milk. When I pointed this out to my mother, she asked me what pasteurization is. We might get sick because my mother is the most horrifically ignorant and out-of-touch person on earth. FML
Today, I threw a tantrum because my younger sister ate my chocolate. I'm almost 18. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my little sister as she explained that all these guys like her now that she's so skinny and beautiful. My mom must have overheard me tell my sister that at least I was a cuter child, because my mom laughed and said, "Yeah right, we had to buy you fat kid diapers." FML
Today, despite begging my parents to get food other than diet and weight loss stuff, they refused. I'm bullied for being skinny on a daily basis. FML
Today, my aunt said that it looked like I lost some weight. I was pleased with this, since I've been trying to lose some. My mom, for some reason, thought it was insulting. She pulled me to aside to assure me that I most definitely don't look any skinnier. FML
Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML
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Top comments
abbttmc 12
The ****?
ovechkinisbeast 9
Hire a hit man?
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Comments (141)
jigglypuff34 16
Ha! What's she going to do, call the police? Another dairy related domestic dispute. Just another day wearing the badge. I say drink strawberry and throw everyone off.
Sandsh8rk 36
Why would your mom do that? It your sister's problem, not yours.
ihaveasushicat 24
I saw your profile picture and then read your comment in a "gasping" type voice...
suri23 11
Drink water:-)
Likian5 26
Tell you sister to get over it. It's not your fault she's too stubborn to change.
HortonThelephant 15
She's Chocolate With Nuts ;)
dalink 24
It's a lie!
bjdog98 9
Do what you want and what makes you happy. Your sisters happiness should not get in the way of yours, she needs a straight up punch to the face.
perdix 31
I'm sure your mom just doesn't want to buy separate milks for each kid. Go with the flow and drink the chocolate milk, too. Sometimes, you just gotta take one for the team, and rarely is what you are taking this delicious!
NeinKittenz 20
Double the milk double the fat folds.
DragonPorn 15
Or the fat little shit can drink skim.
FuKcMee 32
tell that bitch 2 words; SLIM FAST
EpicSquishii 21
Which also comes in chocolate! Everyone's happy
McNikk 15
You guys must drink a lot of milk if she feels like that would make THAT much of a difference in your weight. Sorry about that though. She shouldn't be punishing you when it seems like it's your sister' s fault that she's fat.