By Anonymous - 24/01/2014 15:11 - United States

Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML
I agree, your life sucks 48 665
You deserved it 5 387
Love
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Dthsapprntc 23
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Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back. Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.

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Km1490 20
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Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

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Dthsapprntc 23
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Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back. Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.

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GreatGeak 8
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or grow a pair. but i think that goes well with #1's second part. ^_^

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Rainhawk94 27
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Everytime time i see the phrase"grow a pair" i think of Betty white. Why a pair, why not a vagina, that takes a beating

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arturo_s 10
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Invest in elbow-pads, shin-pads, knee pads, and a helmet along with going with #1s idea and you should be fine

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AnOriginalName 19
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#29, dicks tend to take beatings fairly often too.

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soccerstar1996 18
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Lol it says 5ML instead of FML

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ninthfirewings 11
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She probably will just meet him back at his place

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aahitserin 5
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Don't forget the cup #36!

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krad204 21
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Or just get something to protect your junk, meet her somewhere and tell her it's over, then just leave. If she tries to beat you up, stop her from doing so, I don't know what the big deal is...

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BananaN0se 13
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You could always be on a drive then drive past her house drop her off Say "look at my ex girlfriend's house" then drive away

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Dalleee 29
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talk about bad luck :/

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Exhaling 12
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More like a troll mother or just a clueless mother. Either one fits.

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Rizzen 27
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OP, you need to man the fuck up and do it

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isuckwithnames 22
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Pain is the body saying, that is bad and damages me avoid that., which cause the instinctual reaction to avoid it. Which stems from thousands of years of avoiding things that hurt like a wolf bite.

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Morqan_Freeman 14
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OP needs to first master the power of the 4 elements. Air, water, earth and fire. Only then could OP become the Avatar and stand a chance in a fight against the enemy.

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fluffywaspluka 7
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Put her in a FedEx box and send it to Mexico.

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SomeRandomGuy15 18
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His mom or his girlfriend?

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Nordrag 26
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why not both?

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deviking 10
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*mexican music plays*

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dachayke 16
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TheTacoMan is going to get quite a surprise, isn't he?

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mrfancyman 7
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I'm so done right now

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Km1490 20
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Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

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thatnucca 36
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Yep, sometimes you just have to take the L for the team... Yourself, your ego and...... Such is life

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That_Ginger 18
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The sooner you man up and tell her, the sooner all the drama that you're predicting, will be over. It's tough but you just have to do it and be honest.

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isuckwithnames 22
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I hate the phrase, 'Man up'. The OP is a man and cannot be anymore a man. If he wants to avoid pain so be it. It's like ripping of a adhesive bandage, it will hurt notated what, so it doesn't matter how you do it.

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regenerate 19
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You might want to look into leaving the country.

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NightHawk387 22
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Or faking his death.

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dachayke 16
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Or being a man and fighting back if she tries to hurt you. It's self-defense, which is perfectly legal.

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abnormalbird 11
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#57 yeah but then everyone will think he is a dick.

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ks23 9
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It's not you it's me.....oldie but a goodie

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Dthsapprntc 23
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I prefer it's not me, it's you. OP might end up dead if he tries that one though.

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outoftown 26
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So asking your mom to tell her is out of the question?

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kmartFTW 12
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Fake your death! That always works!

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minesbiggerr 25
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Didn't work so well when Juliet tried it....

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NightHawk387 22
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It did for Sherlock.

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