By Anonymous - 24/01/2014 15:11 - United States

Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML
I agree, your life sucks 48 665
You deserved it 5 387

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Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back. Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.

Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

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Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back. Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.

or grow a pair. but i think that goes well with #1's second part. ^_^

Everytime time i see the phrase"grow a pair" i think of Betty white. Why a pair, why not a vagina, that takes a beating

Invest in elbow-pads, shin-pads, knee pads, and a helmet along with going with #1s idea and you should be fine

#29, dicks tend to take beatings fairly often too.

Lol it says 5ML instead of FML

She probably will just meet him back at his place

Don't forget the cup #36!

Or just get something to protect your junk, meet her somewhere and tell her it's over, then just leave. If she tries to beat you up, stop her from doing so, I don't know what the big deal is...

You could always be on a drive then drive past her house drop her off Say "look at my ex girlfriend's house" then drive away

talk about bad luck :/

More like a troll mother or just a clueless mother. Either one fits.

OP, you need to man the fuck up and do it

Pain is the body saying, that is bad and damages me avoid that., which cause the instinctual reaction to avoid it. Which stems from thousands of years of avoiding things that hurt like a wolf bite.

OP needs to first master the power of the 4 elements. Air, water, earth and fire. Only then could OP become the Avatar and stand a chance in a fight against the enemy.

Put her in a FedEx box and send it to Mexico.

His mom or his girlfriend?

why not both?

*mexican music plays*

TheTacoMan is going to get quite a surprise, isn't he?

I'm so done right now

Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

Yep, sometimes you just have to take the L for the team... Yourself, your ego and...... Such is life

The sooner you man up and tell her, the sooner all the drama that you're predicting, will be over. It's tough but you just have to do it and be honest.

I hate the phrase, 'Man up'. The OP is a man and cannot be anymore a man. If he wants to avoid pain so be it. It's like ripping of a adhesive bandage, it will hurt notated what, so it doesn't matter how you do it.

You might want to look into leaving the country.

Or faking his death.

Or being a man and fighting back if she tries to hurt you. It's self-defense, which is perfectly legal.

#57 yeah but then everyone will think he is a dick.

It's not you it's me.....oldie but a goodie

I prefer it's not me, it's you. OP might end up dead if he tries that one though.

So asking your mom to tell her is out of the question?

Fake your death! That always works!

Didn't work so well when Juliet tried it....

It did for Sherlock.