FML : Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways...

Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous - / Friday 24 January 2014 15:11 / United States

Love

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Top comments

By Dthsapprntc | 23

#5838146 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:38

Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back.

Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.

By Km1490 | 20

#5838157 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:41

Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

Comments

By Dthsapprntc | 23

#5838146 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:38

GreatGeak | 8

#5838176 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:45

or grow a pair.
but i think that goes well with #1's second part. ^_^

Rainhawk94 | 27

#5838226 - Saturday 25 January 2014 1:16

Everytime time i see the phrase"grow a pair" i think of Betty white. Why a pair, why not a vagina, that takes a beating

arturo_s | 10

#5838265 - Saturday 25 January 2014 1:57

Invest in elbow-pads, shin-pads, knee pads, and a helmet along with going with #1s idea and you should be fine

AnOriginalName | 19

#5838311 - Saturday 25 January 2014 3:08

#29, dicks tend to take beatings fairly often too.

soccerstar1996 | 18

#5838351 - Saturday 25 January 2014 4:04

Lol it says 5ML instead of FML

ninthfirewings | 11

#5838758 - Saturday 25 January 2014 12:13

She probably will just meet him back at his place

aahitserin | 5

#5840126 - Sunday 26 January 2014 16:25

Don't forget the cup #36!

krad204 | 21

#5841010 - Monday 27 January 2014 18:23

Or just get something to protect your junk, meet her somewhere and tell her it's over, then just leave. If she tries to beat you up, stop her from doing so, I don't know what the big deal is...

BananaN0se | 13

#6054909 - Tuesday 2 September 2014 20:04

You could always be on a drive then drive past her house drop her off
Say "look at my ex girlfriend's house" then drive away

By Dalleee | 29

#5838147 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:38

talk about bad luck :/

Exhaling | 12

#5838175 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:45

More like a troll mother or just a clueless mother. Either one fits.

By Rizzen | 27

#5838154 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:39

OP, you need to man the fuck up and do it

isuckwithnames | 22

#5838487 - Saturday 25 January 2014 5:44

Pain is the body saying, that is bad and damages me avoid that., which cause the instinctual reaction to avoid it. Which stems from thousands of years of avoiding things that hurt like a wolf bite.

Morqan_Freeman | 14

#5838581 - Saturday 25 January 2014 6:39

OP needs to first master the power of the 4 elements. Air, water, earth and fire. Only then could OP become the Avatar and stand a chance in a fight against the enemy.

By fluffywaspluka | 7

#5838156 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:41

Put her in a FedEx box and send it to Mexico.

SomeRandomGuy15 | 18

#5838252 - Saturday 25 January 2014 1:43

His mom or his girlfriend?

Nordrag | 25

#5838286 - Saturday 25 January 2014 2:21

why not both?

deviking | 10

#5838307 - Saturday 25 January 2014 3:06

*mexican music plays*

MRVOlivia | 22

#5838358 - Saturday 25 January 2014 4:16

Olé!

dachayke | 16

#5838382 - Saturday 25 January 2014 4:41

TheTacoMan is going to get quite a surprise, isn't he?

mrfancyman | 7

#5838384 - Saturday 25 January 2014 4:41

I'm so done right now

By Km1490 | 20

#5838157 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:41

Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..

thatnucca | 36

#5838259 - Saturday 25 January 2014 1:48

Yep, sometimes you just have to take the L for the team... Yourself, your ego and...... Such is life

By That_Ginger | 18

#5838162 - Saturday 25 January 2014 0:41

The sooner you man up and tell her, the sooner all the drama that you're predicting, will be over.

It's tough but you just have to do it and be honest.

isuckwithnames | 22

#5838495 - Saturday 25 January 2014 5:47

I hate the phrase, 'Man up'. The OP is a man and cannot be anymore a man. If he wants to avoid pain so be it. It's like ripping of a adhesive bandage, it will hurt notated what, so it doesn't matter how you do it.