Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to break up with her. It was a hard decision and both of us became quite emotionally overwhelmed at the time. We began to hug as a final goodbye, then her mum burst in the room and yelled, "HE FINALLY PROPOSED!" FML
Today, my mom had my girlfriend and me over. Out of the blue, she pulled out my grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend over to a family lunch, planning to propose to her at just the right moment. My family was in on it, including my apparently disapproving mom, who kept causing a scene to grab my girlfriend's attention every time I went to pull out the ring. FML
Today, I told my best friend I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years. He thought it would be funny to tell her I was going to propose to her that night. She showed up telling me how much she loves me and that when we get married how great it will be. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, I had to break up with my girlfriend at her request, because she "didn't have the heart to do it." Within twenty minutes I'd received four calls from mutual friends, including my best friend, telling me what a jerk I am. And one from my mom. FML
Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML
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Top comments
Dthsapprntc 23
Make sure you have a good head start, then yell at the top of your lungs that you are breaking up with her and start running. Run fast, run far, and never ever ever look back. Or just suck it up and deal with being hospitalized for a while.
Km1490 20
Just tell her.. the longer the wait the harder she will punch you..
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Comments (96)
deathstroke990 22
I don't think you know what the word alimony means....
isuckwithnames 22
No he was implying that op should not get married to, who I am assuming is a socio *****, his girlfriend. How he got the impression that OP will marry the girl is beyond me
Godsofdracos 15
It's a trap!
Xotoolyxo 16
Do it in a large public area, with security around and msybe a couple of close friends
beddington 7
Am I the only one that sees this isn't an FML, but a 5ML??
katertott 44
I saw that too. Maybe OP was typing while on the run from his gf lol
zandalee 20
What you talkin bout Willis?
AngelPendragon 9
if she hurts you have her arrested for assault, stop being such a baby about it.
soragirlfriend 8
Yes. This exactly. Perhaps do it near the local precinct.
Omniprism 15
Good luck. And don't marry her. She sounds horrible. Fake your own death.
princesss_14 9
Talk about awkward! Good luck
its_love2 31
do it in front of the police station then ... or at the hospital ...be sure you change your phone number first lmao