Today, my husband got some junk mail. My grandma brought the mail in and let my 5-year-old open it because it was just junk. It turns out it was a catalog from an adult toys shop. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while I was at my job as senior care, I was in a client's home vacuuming the carpet and found a very used vibrator that belonged to his wife. It wasn't clean. FML
Today, I finally received the vibrator I ordered online. Too bad they labeled what the item was on the outside of the box, and my dad was the one to pick up the packages. FML
Today, I found the birthday card my grandma had mailed. Apparently, it contained a gift of $100. Too bad it was in my mom's trash can, opened, with no money. She told my grandma it must have gotten lost in the mail. FML
Today, as I was cleaning up after my two year-old, I found a pair of lacy underwear in his toy box. Not only are they not mine, but now I have to ask my husband if he's cheating on me. Or ask my babysitter if she's being having fun, instead of actually babysitting. FML
Today, I received a Playboy magazine that I never ordered, and now my husband won't stop laughing at me or calling me a closet heterosexual. FML
Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML
Today, I received a package at work. Thinking it was something I ordered, I opened it in front of my coworkers. It was a gift from my grandmother: a giant pink, “I Love My Grandson” T-shirt. The worst part? They insisted I put it on and take a picture to send to her. FML
Today, my mom asked me to take my dad's mail to him. The "mail" was divorce papers. FML
Today, my 70-year-old boss asked me to order sexy lingerie she saw on the cover a magazine. FML
Today, while visiting my in-laws, I went into their home office in search of a sheet of scrap paper. Instead, I found printed copies of every email and IM my husband and I had ever sent each other, including pictures. Highlighted and annotated by his mother. FML
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Top comments
davidpropert 32
Sounds like your kid saw some real "Junk" ;)
ilovesoccer1610 31
Have fun explaining to your kid what everything is
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Comments (59)
TinyBPFlower 6
Oh no lol!
Sansational_ 18
My Special Blowup Barbie: Comes with various holes, adjustable inflatable breasts, and three fun outfits! 2 AA Batteries Not Included.
Taolan 23
There's mail junk, then there's male junk.
XxGaLaXy_HiTzxX 14
To him it's just a bunch of colors and weird shapes. He'll forget about it, just give it time. Good luck
mylifestorie 11
Omg....