Today, my girlfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex. Over breakfast, she said it was the most intense, primal and mind-blowing sexual experience she ever had. Problem is, I don't remember a damned thing. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up with a hangover and my girlfriend seemed pissed at me. It took me a while before I remembered having sex the night before. I just didn't know exactly what had happened after that had pissed her off. Then I realized nothing happened, because I fell asleep while she was on top of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, I learned that my girlfriend can sleepwalk. She got up, came into the living room where I was laying back against the sofa playing video games. I wasn't really paying much attention, until she stepped on my crotch, after which she left. She doesn't remember a thing. FML
Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but it wasn’t actually her. What happened last night? FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML
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Top comments
AndyBoy 0
FYL indeed sir
ellephaba101 0
I don't get it...?
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Comments (176)
PureGold 0
What? How you have intense mind-blowing sex in your sleep? O_O You definitely earned some bragging rights with that haha.
necromancerlord 0
She just forgot the mindblowing sex was with the guy is she is having an affair with. No biggie.
SurahElle 0
I second this opinion.
anniesaysbueno 0
just remember, drugs are powerful substances.
blabbermouth26 0
Hey she did say it was mind blowing. That's why you can't remember it. The important thing is that she did and you will be known as someone who gets the job done. AIR FIVE!
shayeen 3
If only she had sex with him? Who knows she might had sex with someone else y
RyanRaygun 0
You know your life is shitty when you get sex from your girlfriend. I feel your pain, man. Stay strong.
Nhori 0
Oh the horror, the horror.
machinedreams 0
Maybe she was screwing with you.
DreMaMa 0
She put a pill in your drink, Did 5 other guys while you were knocked out, and gave you the compliments to make you feel like a champ....this is all coming from experience
pocketrockets 0
damn are you serious...shit that sucks.. :(
thatguy3812 25
#17 this comment sounds like an FML itself
I_am_stupid_also 6
A lot of the commenters here are dying to know want model vibrator she used.
Kollene22 0
Nope, it's real. It's called sleep sex, like sleep walking. Happens to me and my boyfriend sometimes.
IscoreOnU 19
Who's asleep?
crazymase 9
yup happened to me and my gf both ways too. and the sex is great
blabbermouth26 0
#17-ew #18-you brought redemption back to the fml that #17 stole