Today, my girlfriend started a conversation with "I don't want to break up" and ended the conversation with "I think I'd be better off alone." So I guess I'm now single. I think. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML
Today, a guy I had developed feelings for broke things off with me, giving me a version of the “it’s not you, it’s me” line. This was the first person I had liked/wanted to date in almost 8 years. I think I’m destined to be alone. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that we should take a break from our relationship, because it'd be best for the both of us. Later, I found out that she really meant it'd be best for her and her new boyfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me telling me I have problems communicating and that I didn't understand her. When I asked her why she didn't talk to me about this before she said "I didn't want to talk about it." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I was unsuccessful at a job interview, and she didn't want to be with someone who "has no future". She's unemployed too. FML
Today, I decided to break up with my girlfriend. I sat her down and gave her the speech. She broke down in tears and said, “Why does every guy always abandon me? Why am I never good enough?” I felt so bad for her that I took back the breakup and we’re still together now. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
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Top comments
kimmi41509 10
Makes no sense. Sounds like she needs to get her mind straightened out.
perdix 31
She's probably ******* that cantaloupe already! You didn't stand a chance against that leather-skinned melon, you poor bastard!
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Comments (115)
uncivil 5
**** bitches get money in the wise words of Tupac
DespairFaction 11
KattWillliams: If you're screaming .... "Bros before hoes" ... "Kicks before chicks" ... "money over bitches" ..... Nigga you Gay.
ChelsiiBabee 5
That's like what my now ex boyfriend did to me...
olpally 33
That's nice, no one really cares though, this is about op... Itskaylabitch, you are the worst commenter I've ever seen... I feel dumber everytime I see a comment from you. also if you want to talk to someone, pm them... Sheesh! *rant over*
DespairFaction 11
Maybe you should have sent this Kayla a pm?
olpally 33
She doesn't listen to any of us anyways.. What's the point??
DespairFaction 11
I guess both of our comments were completely unnecessary. So let's celebrate with a drink of Samuel L. Jackson.
uncivil 5
Ita getcha drunk!!!!
natepooch 4
LMAOO #66
olpally 33
Amen number 85! I got the first round! :D
harp 9
Don't waste any more time, move on to the next one...... Quantity vs quality while you're young enough to enjoy them all....
baked_goods 5
Such an enlightened opinion.
Lisianthus 13
-_- You think?
bethanyjk 0
You're single broha.
MoogleSam 8
It is likely that she just needs time to think things through and she will probably come back at a later date to confirm that she is breaking up with you, or that she has decided she doesn't need nor want to break up with you. If the former occurs, you should ask why she wants to break up and then gracefully accept her decision because it is probably hard on her to make that choice since she took time to make it. If the latter occurs, you should say everything is cool and you'll happily accept her back but that you wish to know why she considered breaking up. If she doesn't come back at all, then go see her and ask whether you are broken up or not because your last conversation confused you and if you are, ask why she broke up with you so that you can improve yourself if it was something about you that made her want to break up with you.
shannonreneee 11
Those were extremely long sentences, I almost passed out
DespairFaction 11
OP:So we are broken up? What did I do? What is wrong with me? Her: it's not you it's me I promise. The thing is I met a cute guy at a bar and I'm having his offspring. He's pretty fly for a white guy.
I_Punch_Babies 7
im willing to bet that shes seeing someone else. she doesnt wanna lose you but she knows youre gonna find out about him eventually so shes covering it up by saying she wants to be alone.
loserman67 36
This sounds like a "friendship" that you took as a "relationship". She wants to remain as friends, you on the other hand want to escalate into a relationship. My advice, keep the friend, forget the relationship, go home and beat the bishop. Keep pushing and you'll find yourself with nothing.
mybright 8
WTF?!?? Could she be more f'n contradictory??? You shoulda asked her at the end if you could sleep with other broads now or are you still in a 'monogamous relationship'!?
Calyx_fml 22
Don't ask her. Tell her.
groupleader 7
Apparently she now is telling everyone that you broke up with her. She's a psycho bitch, you are better off without her.
mybright 8
Do you know OP and the undecided broad?