Miscellaneous: Today, my family was going to go out on a boat to celebrate Independence...

By ellisp1 - 04/07/2017 22:10

Today, my family was going to go out on a boat to celebrate Independence Day. We agreed we'd be at the marina by 11:45 AM. It's currently 1:45 PM and half of the family is still asleep while two are nursing hangovers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 201

You deserved it 489

When Christmas Ends Badly…
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/11/2013 16:43 - United States - Erie

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 073

You deserved it 3 570

July the fourth be with you!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Loveland

Today, during my family's traditional fourth of July weekend celebration, my water broke. I kept trying to tell them and asked them to take me to the hospital, but they couldn't hear me over the fireworks. They all just kept smiling and nodding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 043

You deserved it 3 516

By AnastasiyaNicholas - 18/02/2012 14:20 - United States

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 734

You deserved it 2 041

Higher standards

By Anonymous - 10/07/2020 02:02

Today, my mom fought with me again for missing an "important" 4th of July family barbecue. I was working until the morning, finishing grad school applications. There are always family events, and also apparently my brother missing the same barbecue to party with friends is perfectly fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 685

You deserved it 141

Family day

By Anonymous - 09/06/2023 01:30 - India - Puducherry

Today, all I wanted was to take my two kids and their two favourite cousins to the beach on their last day of vacation together. My mother-in-law went into full beast mode, shouting about how I'm always roaming around and being irresponsible. The kids never meet and are from different cities. FML

I agree, your life sucks 746

You deserved it 115

By lauramarie - 23/07/2011 14:18 - Canada

Today, as I was hung over from a concert and refusing to get out of bed, my dad decided to hook up his top notch speaker system and play Christmas music that shook the house. It's July. Let the family weekend begin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 567

You deserved it 15 610

By Kerry - 19/06/2009 23:55 - United States

Today, all my friends had a huge party and 'forgot' to invite me. They only remembered about me at 2 am when they called asking for rides home because they were all too drunk to drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 108

You deserved it 2 617

By ELLI - 02/10/2017 04:30

Today, all of my friends showed up an hour late for my 18th birthday party because they decided to go get dinner without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 355

You deserved it 287

Can't handle it

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 14:01 - Germany

Today, I feel hung over. Don’t feel up to anything except slouching on the sofa, nursing my headache. Must have been one hell of a party, lots of booze, right? Actually, all I did was go to bed at 11:30 last night, instead of my usual 8.30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 171

By SleepyMommy - 08/05/2016 17:05 - United States - Pomona

Today, my husband was going to let me sleep in for Mother's Day. That would have been great, if my brother didn't call me at 5:30 in the morning to say Happy Mother's Day. Now I'm up like any other day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 427

You deserved it 1 071

Fritterzz 13

Tuesday 4 July 2017 22:11

They seem to be independent people.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 4 July 2017 23:19

Ironically, your day is ruined because you are dependent on those shit people! "When in the course of human events, ..."

Comments

Fritterzz 13

Tuesday 4 July 2017 22:11

They seem to be independent people.

Uralriver 10

Tuesday 4 July 2017 22:15

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

gobiteme2 34

Tuesday 4 July 2017 22:48

And you are standing there why.

davek 36

Tuesday 4 July 2017 23:19

Bloody traitors, throwing perfectly good tea into the harbour and all that. God Save the Queen!

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 4 July 2017 23:19

Ironically, your day is ruined because you are dependent on those shit people! "When in the course of human events, ..."

artybicardi 6

Wednesday 5 July 2017 5:25

Am I the only one who thinks the writer actually had a fun family? ?

Stealthninjaa 19

Wednesday 5 July 2017 7:10

This post seems more like a "MLIA".

RollingToTheTop 4

Friday 7 July 2017 2:22

**I thought that was what the whole holiday was about. Oh, wait. Fireworks?**

smartjaguargurl 17

Friday 7 July 2017 5:16

That's when you go without them. **** them. Don't let it ruin your day.

olga_crvjl 19

Friday 7 July 2017 9:41

Lol damn and I thought my my family sucked At punctuality lol

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I told my mom that I think I’m anorexic and she told me she didn’t care. When I asked why, in disbelief she replied, "Honey, you are 5’3 and over 350 lbs, at this point you NEED to be anorexic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 723

Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 297

You deserved it 1 134

The Top

Today, I broke my toe on a decorative statue I bought for our front yard. My husband warned me it took up too much space and was a hazard, and now I get to hear him say, "I told you so." FML

I agree, your life sucks 369

You deserved it 1 017

Today, my boyfriend of four years proposed to me and I said yes. A few hours later, I found out he's been talking to multiple other girls for about three months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 111

Today, my wife mentioned that she wanted to give me a three-way. I was ecstatic, until she opened her right hand, only to reveal a 3-way lightbulb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 815

You deserved it 42 543

Today, a wasp flew into my car. In my frantic attempt to get away from it, I got pulled over and had to prove I was driving sober. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 976

You deserved it 7 215

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 309

You deserved it 4 676

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 879

You deserved it 12 060

Same thing different taste

July the fourth be with you!

Higher standards

Family day

Can't handle it

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