Today, my dad came over and ordered me, a 43 year-old woman, to purchase a kitchen table. He and my sisters are embarassed that we are still using a plastic folding table. It doesn't matter to them that we have just spent over $30,000 on renovations. His cousins are coming from Italy. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I bought lunch for my grandparents, aunts, and uncles. My uncle apparently felt uncomfortable at the restaurant, because he got up and flipped the table over before leaving. The bill tripled because of the broken glass, and my uncle called me up later for a ride. FML
Today, I told my parents that all I wanted for my 18th birthday was to go to a restaurant in NYC for a nice dinner. My parents said no, because it would cost too much money. I came home to see my parents had bought a huge TV for $800. We already have 3 televisions. FML
Today, at a cheap restaurant, my dad asked me if I wanted a straw. I declined, saying I wanted to do my bit for the environment and not waste plastic when I'm fine without. He grabbed three and dropped them on the sticky table, "just in case." FML
Today, when I finally got delivered the new kitchen table that I ordered online a week ago, I found out that it was actually a kitchen table for a dollhouse, as I forgot to check the size. FML
Today, my elderly dad once again asked me to make a reservation at a restaurant for him and a younger woman he's been seeing. Meanwhile, I haven't had anything even approaching a real date in over a decade. FML
Today, I went to visit my father. His new wife has hoarded out our childhood home nearly to the point of it being unliveable. That’s pretty funny, considering my dad used to literally beat us if our rooms weren’t clean or we left dishes in the sink. FML
Today, my dad had a day off and was 'bored' so he decided to move our entire kitchen into our living room. We now have no running water, no oven that works and the entire house is a bombsite. He has an entire week off. FML
Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofa to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it, and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML
Today, after I bought my house, my dad forced me to do all the DIY with him because I needed to know how to do it myself, but my sister just bought her house and not only did dad hire tradesmen to do a lot of the work, he forced me to do a lot of it as well. Never before have I wished I was a girl too. FML
Today, we finished redecorating my kitchen. My dad has been his usual OCD self about getting it perfect, so when he noticed a shelf was just barely not level, he decided to adjust the screws. It fell off and damaged my floor, so he threw the screwdriver and cracked a wall tile. Thanks dad. FML
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Top comments
FloorX 14
there are so many things going on here
i_wuz_nver_here 31
If you're gonna spend/care that much about your house, why would you still have a plastic table?
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Comments (105)
IorvethTheXolo 8
I don't know why people are so angry and/or confused. From what I understand, it's OP's house and dad is just being pissy because he doesn't want the Italian cousins to see it. There could be any number of things going on here. Maybe the renovations aren't finished. Maybe it's the kitchen being renovated and the table would get dinged up. Maybe they just moved in and want to get the renovations done first. Maybe the renovations weren't just an upgrade for aesthetics, but they just bought a fixer upper and money is better spent on making the house more livable than on a table. Maybe they are renovating it to raise the value before they sell it and would rather buy a table to fit the new house rather than the one they are selling. We just don't know. As far as the dad and sisters being embarrassed, it could be a big family and the OP's house is the only one that can accommodate a family dinner for that many people. We have always done big family dinners at my grandparents' house because they have an enormous house with an enormous dining room with an enormous dining room table and we still have to have a separate kid's table for the children because, even as big as the adult's table is, we're still squished in there. No one else's house would allow us all to eat in the same vicinity. The kids eat in the kitchen at the kitchen table while we eat 10 feet away at the dining room table, but anyone else's house would have us all eating in multiple rooms (that was done at my mom's house once when my grandparents were renovating their house and it was a disaster).
purple_duck88 6
I'm confused as to how people can even be confused by this!
user2499 16
I'm honestly so confused
fullerkate3 17
I can't even process that enough to decide if you deserved it or not
epilepticloh 20
How is this even a confirmed fml??? Lol sorry boot all your different scenarios OP
rec_chem 22
Tell him if he doesn't like your table he doesn't have to come to your house. Or, alternatively, if he doesn't like your table, he can purchase a new one for you.
katertott 44
It's too bad that your family is embarrassed by the type of furniture you're using. It may seem tacky, but after spending so much money on reno, if plastic does the job for the time being, then it will just have to do until the bank account is refreshed and new furniture is bought. It's good that you know your financial limits and are trying to be reasonable and responsible! Remind them that family time isn't about material items or impressing others. They're coming to spend quality time together. (Or at least, they should be. If they're coming to compare homes, be judgmental, and gloat about their wealth, then they're traveling for all the wrong reasons.) Family members should love you for who you are and be understanding about the situation, knowing the home is a work in progress.
noreallywhat 17
Tell him if he wants you to have one so bad to buy it himself. Or if you want to go a more pacifist rout there is always rent a center or goodwill
GirasolNegro 22
Couldn't you just buy a nice table cloth, which will cover the table? If it's covered no one would know what it's made of. Plus, if it bothers your family members so much, A) have them buy you one or B) Tell them to have the family get together ( I imagine that's why the OP mentioned the visiting family) at one of their places or even better... Have it at a restaurant where everyone just sits, eats and relaxes
LyricaSilvan 30
That's when you tell him to **** off and have dinner with his cousins at his own damn house, instead of expecting you to spend more money on things you don't necessarily need just to make HIS life more convenient.
tomvertigo 17
If you bought it, you're enabling that kind of behavior. I hope you told him to stick it, though.