Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

Perhaps he was just being friendly and not flirting with you? There are several times when friendliness can be mistaken for flirting.

I'd like to hear more about his flirting... if you seriously misinterpreted it, or if there was real reason to believe he was interested. Also, did he suggest he drive you home, or did you ask for a ride? Either way, as long as he has a girlfriend, don't try to interfere with their relationship.

Comments

Did you not bother to find out ahead of time if he had one or not?

Time to propose the ménage a trois?

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Since he was flirting with you, you weren't wrong to assume he as available. It's either because he's a cheating fuckboy, or he's not happy in his current relationship. If it's the first, shut him down rudely. If it's the second, stay aloof until he's single.

Maybe what she thinks is flirting is really just him being nice to a coworker.

Perhaps he was just being friendly and not flirting with you? There are several times when friendliness can be mistaken for flirting.

mariri9206 32

This. So much yes. Friendliness is not flirting and we really need to change society's viewpoint/mindset on this. Twice, at work, I was being FRIENDLY to a customer. And, both times, a shift asked me if I was flirting. No, I wasn't flirting. It's called being friendly and, just because I am a single woman and he is a man whose relationship status is unknown, does mean my friendly conversation is flirting and that mindset needs to change. When a man and a woman converse, the first thought should not be flirting.

Nice Guy syndrome can be truly devastating.

I'd like to hear more about his flirting... if you seriously misinterpreted it, or if there was real reason to believe he was interested. Also, did he suggest he drive you home, or did you ask for a ride? Either way, as long as he has a girlfriend, don't try to interfere with their relationship.

Less awkward if you kissed him then found out!

okayy... 1. he offers to drive me home (and often pick me up) every time we work together 2. our coworkers think it's definitely flirting, he treats me differently than everyone else, dirty innuendo, is more physical with me. everyone says it is flirting so i take that because i'm not really good with social cues. 3. i now know he has a girlfriend and they're very cute together, i will not interfere 4. it isn't really that big of a deal, i just don't handle rejection (or anything of the like) in a...healthy way

mariri9206 32

While it does sound like it's more in flirting territory, it's possible he just thinks of a friend and feels, like, kinship with you and that's just his way of being a friend and joking around the like. Next time you think someone might be flirting with you, I recommend (politely/delicately) asking them if they are or not, instead of *just* trusting the opinions of others. And it's good that you'll be working to not interfere in their relationship - it's not uncommon that some people just wouldn't care that they're in one - so you have my respect for that. Additionally, if he still continues to treat you like this and do those same things, maybe he's just not aware it's flirt-like and maybe he could benefit from being aware of the demeanor for it, since he obviously wants to remain loyal to his girlfriend?

chessu 21

I've had a similar situation where I fancied someone at work and were about to ask them out, but luckily found out they were married before I made a fool out of myself (we weren't friends at that point yet and as the wife doesn't work in the company, we've got hot desks etc., it just hadn't come up. It would've definitely been awkward had I/you not found out in advance. Also, I'm really hoping 'asking to kiss me' is meant in a tease kind of way and not outright 'can you please kiss me', because that would've been an awful idea altogether. Just go for the kiss yourself in this scenario. I also agree on the 'was he really flirting' or was he just being polite/nice/friendly or has a slightly dirty sense of humour and acts the same around everyone and you just really wanted it to be just you and read more into it than there was? Either way, you know he's off limits now and unfortunately that's that.