Love: Today, my boyfriend rekindled the romance with his ex, at my...

By fmlfmlfml - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend rekindled the romance with his ex, at my 21st birthday party. One of the few reasons I'd invited her was to show that I trusted him, and I no longer felt threatened by their continued friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36700

You deserved it

8646

Favorite

Love

Never? NEVER?!

It wasn't me

Seize the means of production

By ifeelfat - United States

Today, while at the waterpark, some guy came up to me and profusely thanked me for wearing a one-piece swimsuit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

53041

You deserved it

8073

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, while having a break up fight with my fiancée, she informed me that the paternity of our unborn child was in question because one of the other guys couldn't remember if he got off or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3344

You deserved it

235

Favorite

By Anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29518

You deserved it

4077

Favorite

By penguins - United States

Today, I found out that in the three years I've been dating my boyfriend, his parents have secretly been going through all of his emails, including the ones I've sent him with "sexy" pictures attached. I can't look his parents in the eye without being reminded that they've both seen me naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27099

You deserved it

14646

Favorite

By butterfingers - United States - New Wilmington

Today, I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47189

You deserved it

17944

Favorite

By not_so_sweet_sixteen - United States

Today, was my sixteenth birthday. I was hoping to get a car. Instead, my parents got me a 3 month membership at the gym so I can lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40421

You deserved it

55718

Favorite

By Perplexed - United States - Sioux Falls

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33115

You deserved it

3456

Favorite

By Kristina - United States

Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML

I agree, your life sucks

48905

You deserved it

6851

Favorite

By anonymous - United States - Lakeland

Today, I decided it was time to start looking for my own place and finally gain my full independence. My mom agreed happily without hesitation, which was surprising, but not anywhere near as surprising as finding out I have one day to get my shit together and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29352

You deserved it

3215

Favorite

By Noname - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend had some crazy rough sex. In the process I ended up with huge bruises and bite marks all over my neck and chest. I'm giving a speech on domestic violence today. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32332

You deserved it

92014

Favorite

By tamralee

We've all done it

Today, I scrubbed a spot on a glass window in my house for several minutes. After finally giving up, I realized the spot was on the opposite side of the glass. I wasn't even high. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1088

You deserved it

687

Favorite

By sonice - United States - Duluth

Today, a guy asked me out on Facebook, then called me a conceited bitch when I said no. I don't know, dude; maybe it's just that I already have a boyfriend, that you asked me out on Facebook, and that you posted the same message on 4 other girls' walls as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27353

You deserved it

1858

Favorite

By Anonymous - 20/11/2020 17:04 - United States - El Macero

Ding dong

Today, I got an ingrown hair. It wouldn’t be so bad, if it were anywhere other than my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks

789

You deserved it

112

Favorite

By Miriam

Today, I attended a white elephant party at work and the box I picked had whisky and beer. Since I am a Muslim, I took it to my Christian friend's house and gave it to him. As I was walking there, I passed my imam on the street. Awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9665

You deserved it

1241

Favorite

By Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was selected to give my speech to the entire school. I was later told it had to be censored because it was inappropriate, even though I was just trying to make a point. My speech was on political correctness. My speech on political correctness was censored for political reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49904

You deserved it

5079

Favorite

By loverpants - United States

Today, I made the "Good luck, We'll miss you!" sign for my own going away party. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51736

You deserved it

5520

Favorite

By thanksforallyoursupportmomanddad - United States - Arlington

Today, I overheard my parents talking about my husband. Apparently, they think he's a nice guy and all, but they don't really see him as "husband material." They think I would have been better off with my ex, who doesn't have a job and hurt me both physically and mentally. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28949

You deserved it

1632

Favorite

By Tinker-Bell - France

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48041

You deserved it

17904

Favorite

By jigglypuff100 - United States

Today, while working at the zoo, I noticed a boy throwing candy into the warthog's exhibit. The fastest way to get there was to go through the exhibit, and speak to the kid from inside. I must have said three words when a lollipop hit me in the eye. Then the warthog peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28221

You deserved it

4167

Favorite

By gabby - Canada

Today, I was on the bus and a woman got on with her 3 young children. I offered her my seat so they could all sit together. When I went to get off the bus I realized I left my bag underneath my old seat. When I tried to get it back the woman hit me and yelled at me for trying to steal her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32569

You deserved it

2939

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got a chance to try out my vibrator. I've never orgasmed before with a guy, so I thought there was no hope until my friend gave me the vibrator for my birthday. It was going amazing, better than sex. I was literally 2 seconds away from climaxing when the battery suddenly died. FML

I agree, your life sucks

77987

You deserved it

14904

Favorite

By Bashit - United States - Bullard

Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29377

You deserved it

2063

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I am still coughing. I was diagnosed with whooping cough last week, which apparently cannot be treated. Basically, it appears I'm a 19th century English peasant. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41306

You deserved it

4520

Favorite

By Heinz - Canada - Mississauga

Today, the highlight of my day was that I could afford name-brand ketchup. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26074

You deserved it

2814

Favorite

By ypsitucky - United States

Today, a drunk crashed a truck into my porch. Shaken up, I was glad to see that so many of my neighbors had gathered around to comfort me. When the dust settled, I noticed my remaining porch furniture was missing. They weren't consoling me, they were casing the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34575

You deserved it

3008

Favorite

By Embarresedguy - United States

Today, I woke up and decided to get the morning paper, I went outside with my bath robe on and when I leaned down to get my paper my bath robe came undone. Apparently everyone on my street saw it and decided to bring up public nudity at the next neighborhood meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38557

You deserved it

9703

Favorite

By ev_lyn_aw

Today, I received a company-wide email from my boss, praising a coworker's extra effort at improving our line of business. The coworker's efforts were a direct copy-and-paste of a plan I put together three months ago. No one cared when I gave the presentation. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6770

You deserved it

420

Favorite

By rejecteddd - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. Right after I arrived there, he excused himself to go to the bathroom. He never came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39826

You deserved it

5061

Favorite

By Piano999 - United States

Today, I lied to my crush telling him I can play the piano. To 'prove' it, I recorded a video on my phone of a girl playing a beautiful piece. After I sent it, I realized my mouse cursor was in the center of the page the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5368

You deserved it

61954

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I opened some small cute birthday gifts at my boyfriend's house. As we left to go out, he slipped me a Tiffany box and said he wanted me to open it in private. Flushed and excited, I open it to find a ziploc filled with hair. It was his mustache I had been begging him to shave for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39672

You deserved it

20374

Favorite

By poophead - Philippines

Today, I went to a fancy beauty parlor to prepare for my sister's birthday party. The minute I stepped out of the salon, with my hair beautifully trimmed and curled, a bird decided to use it as a toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29661

You deserved it

2539

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was riding on my bike when a guy on the street shouted, "I LOVE YOU!" at me. I recently told my boyfriend I loved him, and his response was, "I don't love you but I won't treat you any differently." Perverts on the street love me, but my boyfriend doesn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks

54523

You deserved it

5550

Favorite

By Skyler - United States

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62167

You deserved it

14266

Favorite

By awkwardpineapples - United States - Birmingham

Today, I found my sister licking all of the silverware and putting it back in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32770

You deserved it

2554

Favorite

By thanksnicksparks - United States

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I loved her. I tried to be cute and romantic and responded with a quote from the Notebook, which I watched with her yesterday. After I said, "If you're a bird, I'm a bird," she broke up with me because I was "phony and unoriginal." FML

I agree, your life sucks

30643

You deserved it

10248

Favorite

By handygirl - 31/1/2020 14:00 - Singapore - Singapore

I'm here!

Today, I tried fixing my bedroom lock because the push button hadn't retracted. When I closed the door, I couldn't open it again because the spring isn't attached to the latch, so that didn't retract either. I'm locked in my own room. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1589

You deserved it

513

Favorite

By ilook12 - United States - Paris

Today, we had customer complaints of a child molester hanging around our restaurant. After confrontation by a manager, he wouldn't leave. I had to be walked to my car after my shift by more than one person because I look 12 and they were afraid for me. I'm almost 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27861

You deserved it

2154

Favorite

By chelseaface - United States

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37501

You deserved it

3613

Favorite

By astraboy - Australia

Today, I spent 3 hours making a birthday card for my boyfriend, delicately cutting each letter out of printed coloured paper. He used it as a coffee coaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50071

You deserved it

8497

Favorite

By Anonymous - 15/5/2020 23:00

The geyser

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4033

You deserved it

289

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By BadMofeelius | 0

#3418386 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 18:52

Yikes that's rough, best of luck in the future. We don't all do things like this.

By Perdition | 4

#3418442 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 19:03

+1. There ARE still decent people in the world.

I will rarely, if ever, continue communication with a serious ex, much less be friends with her. I don't understand why people think you can go from the feeling of being soulmates and in love to being platonic friends without those feelings coming back. They will, every time. Period.

COMMENTS

By BadMofeelius | 0

#3418386 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 18:52

Yikes that's rough, best of luck in the future. We don't all do things like this.

Perdition | 4

#3418442 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 19:03

OneNightStan | 2

#3418472 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 19:10

At least you know now to move on but it sucks that u found out on ur bday

CompettiveCheer | 0

#3418527 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 19:29

Can't trust hardly anybody these days.. You deserve better.

tylersign | 11

#3418689 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 20:33

Well.. It's your 21st birthday. Drink the pain away ;)

tinkerbell2oo8 | 4

#3418942 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 22:25

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

shoopd | 19

#3419277 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 23:22

I'm sorry. What?

RainbowHeadache | 2

#3419443 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 0:23

52 I'm pregnant with my ex's kid whom I was with for a few years and who was my first love, first everything. And we're just friends. He's made it clear there will be nothing else in between us & I believe him. It doesn't happen to everyone. His mom & dad are the same way.

AshleighNason | 24

#3419483 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 0:33

i agree

tinkerbell2oo8 | 4

#3419556 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 0:56

I wasn't saying that it happens to everyone but it does happen I made it clear me and my ex wouldn't but that change I falling in love with him all over agian

raphanne_fml | 33

#3419620 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 1:35

#77
Let's eat, grandma.
Let's eat grandma.

Punctuation saves lives :D

RA661 | 8

#3420911 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 8:30

Tinker has not learned about run-on sentences. :(

By claiiire_fml | 17

#3418387 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 18:53

Awh, that sucks OP. Now find another boyfriend and show him off to your ex.

Notimetobleed | 14

#3420719 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 7:00

Or cat fight his ex

killinem12345 | 3

#3429106 - Friday 14 October 2011 6:35

Hey

By uprising_fml | 0

#3418389 - Tuesday 11 October 2011 18:53

leave him . it's clear he is not, and will not be over her any time soon .

rldostie | 19

#3422849 - Wednesday 12 October 2011 17:33

I'm pretty sure that part of the FHL is that HE left her. She doesn't have the option of saving face by dumping him. She does have the option of burning anything and everything he left at her place though. Just saying, OP.