Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the dog my now ex-boyfriend and I own together bit me bad enough that I needed stitches on my face and my hand... he then broke up with me and saying it was all too much for him and has kept the dog... FML
Today, I was playing with my dog, teasing her, to cheer myself up after being dumped by my girlfriend. My dog bit me hard and I had to go to hospital. The dog has to be put down. FML
Today, my stepdad is insisting that we either get rid of my dog or euthanize him because he bit me. FML
Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML
Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML
Today, my boyfriend was arrested and might go to prison because he shot the guy who tried to kidnap his dog. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML
Today, I took my dogs to the off leash dog park as usual. Today some dick decided to feed my pup alcohol while I was cleaning up after my other dog. Now my pup is sick and the vet is worried he may not survive. FML
Today, my boyfriend got drunk and had a fistfight with a dumb teenager, which was bad enough, but he also lost the fight, which was just pathetic and embarrassing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Philliesfan9391 3
Put your boyfriend down for violating your dog.
holeyman 8
Instead of getting a new dog, get a new boyfriend.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (230)
Gouryella 0
Tell him to deal with it and grow up. What did he think would happen?
theamusing1 4
Since it's the boyfried who need to be put down and there are laws against that you need to dump him....yesterday.
lucyinthesky420 10
It's his fault for trying to get with your dog. They say true feelings come out when you're drunk, obvi your bfs into **********.
doyouloveme6543 0
Well everyones gotta have that idiot friend. I happen to be that friend.
vfranklin429 0
Time to get rid of the boyfriend not the dog
doglady 16
Get rid of the boyfriend and keep the dog!
shinshoku13 19
Put your drunk ass boyfriend down, problem solved :3
Cysioland 8
Ban him from alcohol.
tomiller64 0
Put them both down
Chris20003 17
Poor dog needs counselling doesn't your boyfriend know gr means gr?