Today, my boss ordered me to read the Twilight series in order to determine if they are "appropriate" for his daughter to read. I'm a 25-year-old bank teller, and I definitely don't remember this in my job description. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss asked me to read through a document. I gave my feedback, saying it seemed like it had been written by an 8-year-old. Turns out it was in fact written by him. FML
Today, a student's mother sent me an e-mail complaining that I was requiring her child to read a book containing mild profanity. She then demanded me to let him read an easier book. This would've been somewhat acceptable if the student wasn't in the 12th grade. FML
Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML
Today, my brother's girlfriend came over to visit and we got to talking about books. Thinking she'd be interested, I suggested a few. She responded that she "only reads good literature." The only books I've ever seen her read are Fifty Shades of Gray and the Twilight saga. FML
Today, my 70-year-old boss asked me to order sexy lingerie she saw on the cover a magazine. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter was suspended from school for doing a book report on 50 Shades of Grey. FML
Today, my boss threatened to fire me because I'm unproductive, and haven't been doing anything. He doesn't tell me what to do, and expects me to read his mind. When I ask him what he wants me to do, he gets pissed and says that I should already know what to do. FML
Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML
Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
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Top comments
Suffolk_yourself 8
If it's an order from your boss then presumably you can read the books at work on full pay? Although personally I'd rather be working!
marcranger 29
I've known sadistic bosses, but that takes the cake! Any chance you can tell yours that based on what you've heard, those books aren't appropriate for anyone to read?
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Comments (75)
Madrias 36
@#27: I'll admit, I tried reading the first book. I just don't like the writing style. Everyone has their preferences, and I'm sure for some, the story is good. I just couldn't get past the style, so I went back to books I enjoy reading. I can't honestly say that the story of Twilight sucks, but I can say honestly that I dislike the writing style.
mattrd_fml 31
I'm so sorry you had to subject yourself to twilight. FYL op.
nmrhog 15
Are you going to be on the clock while you read them?
gigiskye 20
Where is it abusive? Oh wait, it isn't
Nicole_S_ 13
I can say right now that no, no they are not appropriate for anyone of any age because the mythology is beyond f-ed up. VAMPIRES DO NOT EFFIN SPARKLE. END OF EFFIN CONVERSATION.
biopilot17 9
I'd tell him "am I getting paid for it? ..no? Ok then no I'm not going to "
WillMM76 12
If you do it, you're a butthole.
childproofpizza 19
Just tell him the book is shit and she shouldn't waste her time.
nicholcm 5
say that you don't think they are appropriate and recommend the Fire and Ice instead (Game of Thrones). Maybe he wont ask you to proof read in future.
manuwish 9
do whatever they pay you for, OP, or find a new job..I wouldn't read the twilights..but if I get paid to do it, that's different