By Anonymous - 15/09/2009 10:53 - United States
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I agree. This sucks, but I'm kind of sick of hearing these fmls. People need to own up to their feelings. You shouldn't just love someone for 9 years and never tell them! It's ridiculous. And if you did tell him, but he doesn't like you back, then get over it! There are plenty of fish in the sea. If it doesn't work out with someone, it just wasn't meant to be. Move on!
This. YDI for never telling him your feelings. It's been 9 years, you could have said something. If you did say something and he didn't feel the same way then YDI for holding on to those feelings. There is no reason to hold on to a unrequited love, it only causes lots of pain, anger, and frustration. Also, in that 9 years if you weren't all gaga over him, maybe you would have found a man yourself.
I really don't think you love this guy OP. If you really did you wouldn't have waited 9 FUCKIN YEARS to tell him. I can understand maybe a few weeks or something, but if you really, truly love someone, you aren't just going to sit around and have him live his life while you stand and watch. Or if you honestly did that, then YDI x9999999999 and you should fuck off for wasting my time with your pity party.
yeah, i'm gonna go with the majority here. don't just sit around pining away for a man for 9 years and then boo-hoo when he proposes to his girlfriend. if in the extremely unlikely scenario that he was with the same girl for the entire 9 years, then you should have accepted reality and moved on to someone available years ago.
How is that fair to the Gf is she tells him. Lets say that the best friend does think about it and decide he might want to take a chance with his "best friend." The Girlfriend who worked very hard and was there when the Best Friend needed it has now had her love taken from her. I think the OP lost her chance eight years ago. I mean I understand not wanting to put yourself out there, but after nine years OP let the Girlfriend have her dream. I know you don't want to see him marry the girlfriend but you lost out. DOn't ruin the moment.
No-ooo... If she's held it in for nine years she can just keep right on doing it. Best-case scenario is that she tells and he says, "That's sweet, but look, I'm marrying this girl I actually love and communicate with." Worst case, everything gets all confuzled and bemuddled if the guy is as insecure as the OP and the wedding goes to hell because one person decided that NOW was the right time to be just a little bit selfish.
Why haven't you either told him by now or moved on? If you haven't told him and are just being a friend, it's your own damn fault. If you told him and he wasn't interested, you should have moved on by now. This sucks, but it's your fault no matter which way I look at it.I'm sorry for your pain, but go find someone else.
It's hard when someone you want doesn't want you, but honestly, if you aren't strong enough to be able to realize that you need to let go, then you probably aren't ready for a serious relationship. You need to be emotionally strong before you commit, and anyone who has loved someone for almost a decade without any results doesn't seem like a strong person to me.
it's a tough line to walk right now, OP. while it'd be great to tell him and have everything work out, life doesn't always work out that way. he might just not have the same feeling towards you. especially if he is about to propose to his grilfriend. tell him anyway, because you don't want to always wonder. but be prepared for ANY outcome or response.
9 years? its time to move on fyl though
you should tell him how you feel before he marries her...or you'll regret it.