There is no way that could be true

You gasped...as in...your mouth was wide open for reception?

Shit...literally.

hhmm..grassy crap in my face or donkeykicked in the balls.... decisions decisions

Wow, after reading this I feel so much better about my day.

That`s just terrible luck. F your life indeed.

you work in a milk parlor. FYL

Where do you live? Just curous, cuz I've never seen a milking parlor.

That is horrible. But still really funny.