Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML
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Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML
Today, after going on a fly-killing spree all around my house, I had the most ridiculous nightmare where I was terrorized by a fly that looked like it was having a seizure whenever it was flying. When it landed on my arm, I woke up and felt a strange sensation on my arm. Great, I didn't want to sleep anyway. FML
Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML
Today, I woke up by inhaling a fly up my nose, and feeling it twitching and slowly dying inside my nasal cavity. FML
Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML
Today, I woke up this morning and there was suddenly dozens of flies all around the house, so I put up fly ribbons to deal with them. Within three hours, every inch of every single one of those ribbons was covered in dead flies, and there were still more flying about. I don't have any more to put up. Uh oh… FML
Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML
Today, I put up one of those hanging fly catchers in my room due to the unsettling amount of flies in the house. I remarked how stupid flies were to land on them. Within an hour, I got up and walked straight into it. FML
Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML
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Top comments
ajilon7 17
I feel bad for laughing...
Chiroptera_Man 10
I guess those ants are a real buzzkill :3
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Comments (80)
rallison22 22
Thats disgusting
PenguinBitch 44
The ants were planning on eating you too but their drugs weren't strong enough.
hasabo 12
Man up dude are you what a girl or something
feven 32
Am I the only one who finds it weird that the dad automatically thought OP's sister was being murdered...?
swedeNix 13
Time to clean ur room?
hmrhoades 18
....at least he would help you find them?
noah_1234 24
its just their food, but i would understand that being your first sight as you woke up
Witchylady 18
Why do you have so many ants in your room. So you have a nest in there? Maybe you need to clean your room more often
graceface1031 7
I love how his first thought was that your SISTER was being murdered in YOUR room rather than you..lol
mackdeezy 22
Hey man, no one screams when you eat, do they?