By Anonymous - 30/12/2009 04:58 - United States

Spicy
Today, I woke up and realized I'd experienced my first "nocturnal emission". I'm a 24 year-old guy who has been married for 3 months. Guess who isn't getting any. FML
I agree, your life sucks 20 419
You deserved it 3 110
When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

vrock 0

Wow, its bitches like you that make me love my girlfriend

58 5
allmidnighteyes 10

Is your "BF", by any chance, the hamster in your profile picture?

49 2

Comments

NoNameForM3 0

YOU COULD HAVE JUST SAID "WET DREAM" FFS you made me search in google....

47 6
jrkarikas 0

got my 1st wet dream at 11. started jizzing at 12. ur wife is probably unsatisfied.

8 3
ZleveL 0

I had only one wet dreamsnd I was thirteen, started jizzing at 10 :p

0 15
TripleD76 1

hahaha I was just about to google it too then I was like "hey, somebody probably commented wat it means" lol

16 2
TheAPPLESLAVE 4

Wtf bit young don't ya think???

3 8
jess_1193 13

OMG same here I was about to look it up and was like nah someone already would have! HA!

4 2
bulletetl 3

wow! I can relate, newly wed, 24, and have my 3rd nocturnal emission in the last 6 months! I never had on in my life before living with the new wife.. fml too!

49 3
itouchguy360 3

I think she is hot and your brain is trying to tell you something! Have sex with her whenever you can!

23 0
blland 0

night ****, sleep cum, wet dream... I just repeated myself and what I'm saying is redundant.

34 2
perdix 29

Are you on Ambien or something? Were you standing over her sleepwanking when you had this supposed "nocturnal emission?" And duck2121, this is the Internet -- here, we answer our own questions about general information. Learn to Google (or, God forbid, Bing). You'll be better for it.

41 12
ZleveL 0

>.> <.< YAY IM THE FIRST ONE TO REPLY TO PERDIX!!!!!

5 40
spazz666 18

^and yet you didn't even reply to his comment... Perdix, I usually don't google anything when I'm reading FML because I'm a teenager and lazy. Besides, someone always comments saying the definition or meaning of the phrase/word I'm questioning. ;D

17 1
bombtastic 10

boohoo you aren't getting laid. grow up. if you thought marriage meant unlimited sex, be ready to become disappointed. maybe ***** going on with her body or something, or maybe she just isn't in the mood because you aren't putting any effort into it. you want us women to **** you, do something other than strip and be like okay your turn and be lazy throughout the process. kthx :)

22 96
BoWZeR 1

u probably don't get any cuz ur ******* ugly

0 0
vrock 0

Wow, its bitches like you that make me love my girlfriend

58 5
hollyl925 15

You make it sound like your sex life is nearly non-existant if existant at all.

0 0