Valentine's slay, Broken and Health: Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off,...

By Anonymous - 15/02/2012 05:09 - United States

Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off, feeling incredibly sick. I then ran downstairs and had diarrhea while I threw up. I spent Valentine's Day having diarrhea every time I coughed or sneezed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 897

You deserved it 2 952

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/09/2010 02:35 - United States

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 137

You deserved it 2 817

Hot lava from both ends

By SickBoi - 30/03/2021 14:01 - United States - Cambridge

Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 92

By I stink - 18/12/2018 15:30

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 348

You deserved it 225

By Anonymous - 31/10/2009 19:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 765

You deserved it 6 742

By sadddddd - 11/09/2011 01:54 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 873

You deserved it 3 266

By Anonymous - 05/01/2011 20:22 - United States

Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 470

You deserved it 5 802

Geyser

By Ouch - 15/08/2009 07:51 - United States

Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 611

You deserved it 11 127

By sickofsick - 30/12/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 653

You deserved it 3 978

By Will - 21/02/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 198

You deserved it 2 766

By Rayvyn - 21/10/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 879

You deserved it 7 369

allmidnighteyes 10

Tuesday 15 February 2011 12:12

I got the magic in me. Every time I sneeze, I shit violently. Magic, magic, magiiic. Magic, magic, magiiic.

Mirorbo 26

Tuesday 15 February 2011 12:21

Darling, if it was coming from both ends, it was probably food poisoning. Don't quote me on that though, I'm just speaking from experience.

Comments

sonyasonya 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 13:36

damn same situation here! what a valentines dayyyy

danditko 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 13:42

me too!

lizzytishxo 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 14:42

lj Plutouuimiikuukkko

underpaid011 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 14:50

find a guy into German scat **** and have a great day.

palltaru 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 14:57

I got sick right AFTER Valintines day lol

xiogang 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 14:58

hell yea I was sick on valentines day 2 awesome!

EvilDave 13

Tuesday 15 February 2011 14:59

Sounds like the OP got food poisoning.

aixoria 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 16:02

I spent the day at home too. But with a terrible headache. the night before, my boyfriend was over and it hurt worse. I started crying in front of him D: