Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML
Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch." I had to wash his plate. FML
Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML
Today, I saw my 22-year-old boyfriend blow his nose into his hand, then wipe his snot on our couch. There was a box of tissues directly in front of him. FML
Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
Today, I had awful morning sickness, and I asked my husband if he'd get me a drink while I went to the bathroom. On the way back, I witnessed him spitting in the glass. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML
Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML
Today, while cleaning the house, I discovered that my husband has been making a little mountain of whatever he finds up his nose on the underside of our couch when he watches TV. FML
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Top comments
Hypertudism 15
Are you positive he's not just doing that to make you want to make the sandwiches yourself?
Ranimal 12
That is seriously disgusting. I really hope you said something to him.
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Comments (77)
soccerpowell 5
Thats why the girls are usually the ones to make the sandwiches. IT'S A JOKE CHILL
SMHsohard 22
That's vile, and I actually gagged while reading it. I wouldn't let him within 50 feet of the kitchen ever again. And, he would get his food served on paper plates, with plastic silverware.
shanannygians07 28
Well at least he didnt spit in your sandwich..
migueljm5 18
Damn thats ******* nasty
carecow 16
So that's the secret ingredient..
martin8337 36
Or his special mayonnaise.
sunnyray812 42
EWWWWW!!!!
sparky333441 18
Your username was the funniest part.
jayjay76 5
that is disgusting how do you live with him?
FrankHotpants 31
That is in fact gross, but, you'll be alright.
jw90 18
That's nasty. I wouldn't let him make the food from now on.