Today, I went to Seattle with my mom to visit my pregnant sister, only to end up being dragged to a store to buy maternity clothes. The saleswoman apologized to me repeatedly for not having a lounge for the fathers, but congratulated me on the baby. I'm a girl. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML
Today, my mom dragged me along with her to a baby shower. I was the only guy there. FML
Today, my sister asked if she could look through my closet to find something to wear. She is 6 months pregnant. FML
Today, after feeling down due to another negative pregnancy test after my hubby and I have been trying for over a year, my mom insisted I come to a BBQ to "cheer me up." I get there and what do I see? Blue and pink balloons. My sister was announcing her pregnancy. My mom got pissed at me when I walked out. FML
Today, I've been in my old hometown visiting because my sister is having her baby. I scheduled the trip a full week after her due date, and still no baby. We tried everything to start her labor. I had to go back home, and as soon as my plane landed, I got a text saying she just gave birth. FML
Today, I was at the airport to pick up my mother since my baby is due soon. As she arrived, I smiled wide and opened my arms for a hug, but she walked right by me. Apparently, being pregnant makes me unrecognizable. My husband and I had to tell it her was me, her own daughter. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping with my older sister. An elderly couple passed, and the man pointed to my sister, saying, "She LOVES to eat." My sister is 7 months pregnant, and I had to spend the next hour comforting her as she bawled her eyes out because of an off-hand comment from a stranger. FML
Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
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Top comments
oogie_boggie 0
You then should have said you were her sister. I cant imagine the employees face
daviesha 0
seattle is a very gay friendly city. She could have figured u to were a gay couple and thought u didnt want to shop with her
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Comments (100)
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Jane doesn't have a beard like OP, so she's probably OK.
elmorous 0
lol It's Pat!
DumSpiroSpero 0
Are you a stud??
Allymeme 3
ydi for being a disgusting ugly bitch! There should be Islands where all ugly people are sent to.
roymustanglover 0
Aww! There's nothing wrong with looking like a guy! You probably look handsome! :) People always think that I'm a guy....Of course, that's because I identify as bigendered, and always try to look as androgynous as possible.....
lily27_fml 0
why does how other people dress make YOU feel awkward? dont give a **** and you'll be fine!
areanii 0
Calm down! She probably just thinks you're lesbian, and since your sister was pregnant, you were obviously the daddy! :D
butter123 0
Hahah your life sucks but that is actuallly funny
hollymacie 1
i can only imagine what the baby is gonna look like
midghtsniper 0
Yah Seattle sucks:( im stuck here for another 4years