By Trainer Calypso - 27/11/2014 20:38 - United States - Schofield

Spicy
Today, I went to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I watched as my uncle and his girlfriend snuck off to the bathroom together, where they stayed until someone else tried to get in. When they came out, she was wiping her mouth. I need new eyes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 943
You deserved it 4 068

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Maybe it was her way of saying thanks.

Looks like the turkey wasn't the only thing getting stuffed.

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Maybe it was her way of saying thanks.

On the bright side, at least it wasn't your girlfriend

Or maybe she was dreaming of a white Christmas.

"Thanks for this delicious penis you've bestowed upon my mouth!"

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Happy Holidays for your uncle at least

Holy Water works as great eye drops!

I tried this and it burned, should I call a priest?

#11, I wouldn't. He might try to perform an exorcism on you.

Or altar boy you!

I think it burned because it wasn't purified properly. The best way to get pure Holy Water is to really boil the Hell out of it!

Or using brain bleach works just as well

#57 you should really have way more likes.

Finally in the first comment

That's so sweet. Exchanging Christmas gifts orally.

She got a tooth brush??

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Where did you ever get your amazing detective skills?

I heard bleach works wonders

No, the girlfriend sucks.

Looks like the turkey wasn't the only thing getting stuffed.

She was just trying to get some gravy. At least you didn't walk in on him stuffing her. Edit: damn anti flood 10 beat me to it

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like ur butthole?

Clarification: I was originally going to say what #10 said. (They hadn't posted it yet, when I started typing -- look at the time stamp...) When I clicked "validate", a couple of new posts were there and I saw that our posts were almost exactly the same, so I rushed to change it to something different, but couldn't think of anything new in the two minutes or so that they allow you to make changes.