Today, I went to a club with some friends. I ordered two drinks from the waitress and gave her a fifty. She never returned with the change, and the rest of the staff claimed they didn't know who I was talking about. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the bar I go to every week. My favorite bartender told me I owed $50 for a tab because the waiter screwed up and undercharged me. The tab was from when my friends bought me drinks to cheer me up because my girlfriend moved away. I ended up paying for my own drinks, plus theirs. FML
Today, I finally turned 21, so my friends and I decided to go to a club. There, I met this hot waitress and we were really hitting it off. I ordered a drink. She replied, "No problem, kiddo." FML
Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML
Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML
Today, while I was waitressing, two girls ran up a tab of $60 in drinks. They ended up not paying the bill and walking out. My boss told me it won't be the first time or last, as he made me pay their bill. FML
Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML
Today, I was sitting at the bar of a popular local restaurant. I sat there for a few hours and drank my sorrows away with the bartender. I thought she was pretty, and decided to give her a large tip. The tip sent me over my credit card limit, and the bartender is not single. FML
Today, I went out and got very drunk. I talked to a girl and some other people. As the girl left, someone told me to follow her as she didn't seem to know where she was going. As a drunk, socially inept idiot, I did so for about 20 seconds, only for someone to point me out to her and quickly guide her away. Then I lost like £700. FML
Today, my friends and I went out for drinks. I'm the only one who's actually 21 or over, and they have fake IDs. Not only was I the only one to be carded, the bartender thought that my actual ID was fake. I got kicked out while my friends kept drinking. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
buck33 14
It's a conspiracy!
XxchristinasmhxX 0
I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't even work there...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (114)
ICastillo 25
You got jacked man.
forever_born 6
Lol next time know who your waitress actually is!!!! I would be offend if I was her
capnbzarr 43
Smash up the place and set her car on fire. Metaphorically speaking ;-)
Suba_fml 8
I feel a lawsuit coming on.
Addyy_ 5
His dumb what?
DazedSiren 5
Bad judge of character lolz! Was her shirt the same color as the staff?
hhhwat 0
Dear lord that's an awesome trick, sucks to be you though. FYL
vbmg152 19
Why are you paying before you get the drinks? I wouldn't do that! I was a cocktail waitress/bartender for 20 yrs. There are a lot of dishonest people in clubs! They'll do/say anything to get your money! YDI Be more careful whom you give your money to next time!!!
pdes017 3
she could have kept the change either way...
justme84_fml 2
real hustle! uk tv show
fortunelady 17
No, it's not! Hustle only goes for big-time, rich jerks. They're not petty thieves. I love Hustle.
purplemonsta444 0
Haha was she in a uniform or did you just give some person a 50