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OP here. Yeah I did dodge a bullet. Fucking moron, that one. I spoke to her the next day and it turns out that she only knew Haiti from the what she saw on CNN. I told her that's fucking stupid and there is no "certain" way to look like an ethnicity. She kept trying to find rationalizations like maybe I was mixed with French or something. Nope. I'm full on darkie. What makes this worse is that she's African American and lives in South Florida. So there's no way she hasn't interacted with Haitians before. I always hear from fellow Haitians that they get this a lot, but its the first time it actually happened to me. For the people asking, my mothers cousin passed in the earthquake and my dads family lost their home. My godsister also passed away. It was not an easy time at all. I'm not sure how the conversation came about with me & her but needless to say, there won't be a second date.
By Kn0wledge123 - / Wednesday 26 June 2013 05:27 / United States - Miami
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By  SweetJTBR  |  22

Take it as a compliment, cutie. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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  JustStella  |  28

This is one of my pet peeves... I am also Haitian and my cousin and I get that all the time: "WHAT?? You're Haitian?! No way, you're too pretty!!" WHAT THE HELL is that supposed to mean? Then they get all surprised when I voice that I did not appreciate that "compliment". Ignorance indeed.

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  DerrickJames  |  33

Guys.. I am pretty due the earthquake that hit him was a 7.0.

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  Kn0wledge123  |  20

OP here. Yeah I did dodge a bullet. Fucking moron, that one. I spoke to her the next day and it turns out that she only knew Haiti from the what she saw on CNN. I told her that's fucking stupid and there is no "certain" way to look like an ethnicity. She kept trying to find rationalizations like maybe I was mixed with French or something. Nope. I'm full on darkie. What makes this worse is that she's African American and lives in South Florida. So there's no way she hasn't interacted with Haitians before. I always hear from fellow Haitians that they get this a lot, but its the first time it actually happened to me. For the people asking, my mothers cousin passed in the earthquake and my dads family lost their home. My godsister also passed away. It was not an easy time at all. I'm not sure how the conversation came about with me & her but needless to say, there won't be a second date.

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  FloMarDee  |  18

I lived in south Florida some years ago(ft Myers/Naples), they are VERY racist there... I would get followed around garage sales because "Haitians are known thieves"... I'm not even Haitian! Sorry but u really did dodge a bullet buddy!

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  Cynical_1  |  26

Wow OP! You say in your profile that you are an optimist when it comes to people and you prefer to look for the good in everyone instead of focusing on their flaws...yet you call the girl a fucking moron and say there won't be a second date. Doesn't sound like you tried very hard to find the good in her. Guess you don't have as much of a problem with negativity as you claim. You know...she may be ignorant and she may be wrong about why...but you are a liar, and an asshole too if you ask me. Also...considering your written communication skills...you calling her a moron is a lot like the pot calling the kettle black. At least ignorance can be fixed. Sorry for the harsh criticism, but I can't help it. I believe in "direct".

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  littlekellilee  |  41

133, How would you expect him to go on a second date with her after she was so racist? He did give her a chance to redeem herself and she failed. He's doing the right thing by walking away. Speaking of the pot calling the kettle black, you're being a little overly critical, aren't you? OP, I'm sorry for your loss and that now you're having to deal with this on top of it. You'll find a girl that isn't such a fool soon!

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  Kn0wledge123  |  20

@133 Like I said, I spoke to her to next day for her to explain herself. I could understand culture shock and not use to seeing something that is opposite of what you're used to. What turned me off is that she kept trying to rationalize that there was NO WAY that I'm Haitian. She went out if her way to say that we "look" a certain way, and apparently I'm way above that "standard". I don't even consider myself to be that good looking. I'm sorry, but anyone like that is an idiot and not worth my time. Also, I wrote my profile a about two years ago. People can change a lot. I still try to be as optimistic as possible but I won't be what we call "sanwont". That means a person who never learns their lesson after being burned the first few times. Thanks for the response though. P.S - your written communication skills aren't top notch either.

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He gave her a chance by giving her a date. Then she blew it by being not only ignorant but rude and racist. I'm sorry, but if anyone gave her a second chance after that, they would be moronic. There's a limit to where you can give people chances, and Op isn't stupid enough to let someone insult him (especially when family deaths and destruction are involved) and have them come back. I don't think anyone in their right mind would do that. And you being so harsh after reading his comment on the death and destruction he has faced is really not much better.

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  kaysammi  |  8

Your the one that sounds like the asshole right now. She was a fucking moron to say such things without knowledge like you are right now. Learn the big pucture and stop focusing on the small insignifigant details.

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  jamnglamgirlie  |  17

What a fucking bitch! What's she trying to say about Haitians?! Also I kind of get what you mean. My classmates thought I was Cape-Verdean until one day they were making fun of Haitians and I confronted them. They even made up a racist slur for us. It's H2.

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  Cynical_1  |  26

Well OP...if what you have written about yourself in your profile is no longer truly representative of who you really are then perhaps you should change it? Or maybe it was all just BS to begin with. I knew I wouldn't be popular for my opinion and I don't care. I hate when people try to pass themselves off as someone or something they aren't and to me you come off as anything but the nice guy you seem to want everyone to think you are. I wouldn't be at all suprised if you brought up the earthquake as a sympathy ploy to try to improve your chances of getting laid.

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  melody91  |  8

At least there was a compliment in there and you are pretty good looking :-) I'm sorry to hear about your family, it kills me that anyone would have to go through something like that.

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  iCherryPanda  |  12

South Florida eh? I went to school in south Florida and you're right, there are Haitians everywhere. I worked with a bunch. Really nice people, most of em. Hope you don't get that kind of judgement again!

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  elizlab89  |  11

So sorry for your loss. I am Haitian my self. My mom and her family were also affected by the quake and I lost 2 uncles. I'm glad that there won't be a second date with her. I'm from S. FL and know for a fact that she had to have had several interacted with Haitians before. Stupidity and lack of interest in other cultures is her issue. I wish you the best.

By  SweetJTBR  |  22

Take it as a compliment, cutie. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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  AngrySailor  |  17

^ Maybe you should read comment #4 and it's replies.

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  Harpy20  |  24

2: I've had people tell me, "You're pretty, for a black girl..." It's hard to take something like that as a compliment. What we hear in that: 'In your eyes, almost all black/Haitian people are ugly so it's surprising to see an attractive one.' Just to clarify why it isn't a compliment.

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  kelseythompson  |  27

That doesn't make her racist.. you're just as ignorant as she is my god..

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  kelseythompson  |  27

Racism is hate towards a specific race or a belief that your race is super, she assumed that all Haitians must be ugly which is not racist but prejudice.. Either way she's a bitch.. just a prejudice bitch

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  Pwn17  |  25

I suppose if you want to be specific, though she did think other races were superior in terms of cuteness. It was a little of both racism and prejudice.

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  chatokun  |  10

The terms are often ill defined. When I took Sociology in high school, my teacher related a story about racial prejudice and discrimination. He once had an Asian girl he wanted to treat right and not be "racist". He was nice to her, careful with her, etc. She hated it, and complained to him: he was treating her differently than her classmates, even if the intent was positive. He still racially discriminated. That, to me is the real definition of racism. .. to view and treat someone differently based on race or ethnic background. Especially if you take actions or decisions, as she obviously did, by leaving. She could have said she never met such a cute haitian and, while still being prejudiced, still a decent and not discriminatory person if she remained on the date.

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#5 And you are a bit of a nit-picking, overreacting know-it-all, I'd say. "You are as ignorant as she is"?? Really? Get off your pedantic high horse and watch out for the manure on your way down.

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  Cian_1  |  28

I personally detest the way that people class other cultures into different "races". We are all one race; the human race. We have different cultures throughout the world, but we are the same race!

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  Futacy  |  29

38- This a little off topic, but I remember back in middle school, I had a teacher just like that. She treated me like Ms. Morello treated Chris from Everybody Hates Chris (that's a bit of an exaggeration, but it was somewhat like that).

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  unkhammun  |  5

#5 this coming from Florida, where we see a great amount of Haitians, they're mostly dark skinned. If she implied Haitians can't be cute, most likely she was referring to that, hence rendering her logic a tad racist. So original comment was on the right track.

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  kelseythompson  |  27

Okay maybe it was both racist and prejudice.. no one really knows exactly why she thinks Haitians can't be cute.. And I will stay in school.. because obviously I need it.. lol

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  Cynical_1  |  26

Prejudice is when you prejudge another person for whatever reason. When that prejudice is based on their ethnicity then that is racism. So yes...the girl is racist.

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  monnanon  |  13

ah ok. i was wondering if you were maybe another ethnicity but lived on haiti and thats why she had been so shocked but obviously she is just a complete tool. I am sorry for your loss in the earthquake op.

By  Nolimit2217  |  32

If the fact that you may be an immigrant turned her away, you're better off without her!

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  fakedsincerity  |  32

It doesn't even say that, just that he was in Haiti at the time of the earthquake.

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  MissVeracity  |  12

Yes, after re-reading the FML thoroughly I can agree it is quite ambiguous about the specific circumstances regarding whether he is indeed of Haitian decent, but it says his family was affected by the earthquake, not that he was there himself.

By  cocosaure  |  8

Wow you sure didn't lose much my boyfriend is from Trinidad and I hear he is black all the time. I am sorry man but people need to get down with whoever and whatever that girl is dense and a loser! Thank god that ended quick!

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  MissVeracity  |  12

There are quite a few ethnic groups within Trinidad, not just of African descent, such as East Indian or mixed. She's saying that people automatically assumes her boyfriend is just black, hope that clears things up :)

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  brackaman  |  18

That sounds about right. I was at work and someone heard me Swotch between Spanish, Chinese, Korean and English. When they asked where I was from and I said Trinidad I was told "no you're fucking not." it was when I responded "well I guess I'm a fucking martian then" that they got the point.

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  8KAGE8  |  8

79- I feel you there. I tell people that my hair is dark brown and not black all the time but they always say "no it's not". People act like they know everything about me. I've even got someone say that to me directly after explaining how I hate it when people say that to me. People just don't get it

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