Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was walking on the street when a woman in front of me dropped a couple of dollars. I picked them up and chased her to return it all. She insisted that it wasn't hers. I tried to tell her it was, but she wouldn't accept it. A cop saw me and arrested me for solicitation. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML
Today, I was working at my job as cashier. This really attractive girl who often comes in walked in, so I mustered up the courage to ask her out by writing my number on a dollar bill. She paid and the amount her change happened to be a dollar. I go to hand her the money when she sees it and says, "Keep the change!" FML
Today, a woman came up to my cash register, where I was struggling with the cash, and asked if we took cash. FML
Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML
Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML
Today, I needed to borrow money from my girlfriend. I went into her bag and pulled out the money all while a lady watched me open-mouthed. Turns out it wasn't my girlfriend's bag. It belonged to the lady watching me. FML
Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML
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Top comments
CammyGal 26
And this problem couldn't be fixed with a simple explanation?
cmayer 20
I don't know how people can be so presumptuous.
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Comments (110)
pame7a 1
Forget her! Free money for you, and good karma is coming too!
caligirllife 11
It sucks that people assume the worst. Shows that she deserved to drop that money. Next time take the luck and keep it.
55anonymous 3
Is she a prostitute? Why would anyone assume that first? I'd be offended to interpret it that way.
thehowiie 6
she must be a hooker then and was offended because she was off duty when you asked
Namenlos_fml 20
Who would think that??
ChuckNorris2 4
I'd just reply with "eww god no, count your money, you'll see I'm telling the truth"
Vaati_fml 20
The fact that some people think sexually of acts like this just destroys my hope for humanity.
Dashelle 25
I bet she fell dumb when she learned the truth. Or did you pocket it? :)
ashleyylove3 22
Well in that case I hope you kept it
Dalleee 29
she thinks highly of her self