Today, I was snuggling in bed with my girlfriend. She was depressed, so I complimented her strong legs, saying they were "like a horse." I spent the next hour and a half trying to stop her crying. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML
Today, my girlfriend was upset, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her how much I love her and how beautiful she is. After a minute, her face started to light up. I thought it had worked until I realized that she was being cheered up by the friends she was talking to online. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML
Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML
Today, my girl and I were in bed trying to nap before class. She kept tossing and turning, obvious signs that she was having no luck. Sweetly, I ask her if there was anything I could do to help her relax. She says "you can tell me a story about your day, that always puts me to sleep". FML
Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML
Today, I was really depressed so I talked on the phone with my best friend. She was telling me how a guy she really liked complimented her. I told her it was be nice to get at least one compliment. After a long silence she says, "You're really good with computers." FML
Today, my fiancée told me she was having a bad day while we were lying in bed. Just as she was about to fall asleep I thought it would be sweet if I sang her a song that her Mom sang to her when she was a child. Instead, I was told to shut the fuck up and that I sucked. FML
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Top comments
Wandering_fml 0
Dude, some advice; if you EVER compare your girlfriend to an animal, make sure it isn't a huge animal that could be considered an indirect way of calling her fat. And even then, you're taking a big risk. When she's depressed, don't say much. Let her talk. She'll talk herself through it, all she needs is someone to listen to her and hold her. Someone who cares.
Jared1James 4
Maybe it would be a better idea to just snuggle with her and no stupid comments. If my girlfriend was depressed, I'd kiss her neck and tell her I love her and make her smile and laugh. :) But nice try. :P
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Comments (218)
endless_text 0
Your girlfriend is way over-sensitive. Who cries for half an hour over something like that?
lmmmr 0
She was already upset. Reading comprehension fail.
Ox_Baker 0
Still, crying for an hour and a half is pretty bad. She was upset, but it's not like her mom died.
inlovewithPosey2 0
ironic that your picture is a horse:P
BTSfanatic 0
Uhm maybe somone who's depressed? What doesn't matter how long she cried. The point was she was crying and hurt and deserved some love and laughs. Maybe she'll kick you in the face with her horse legs and you can cry for and hour and a half with her.
iphonebro 0
YDI for relating her to a horse. when people say my legs are like a horse, I take it as a compliment because I have alot of leg muscle cD
bexox 0
Yeah well, I'm guessing you're a guy, considering you have "bro" in your name.
z3r0ram 0
why do you automatically amuse that bro is a term for a guy? it could be a female surfer. grow up and stop labeling either sex. it's the 21st century and we still have this feminist/feminist empower garbage
staceybby 0
I think you mean "assume" not "amuse" and also, "bro" is short for brother, anyone who thinks it can be applied to women too is an idiot.
percawesome 0
Brosephine is an acceptable substitute ;D
Leprecon 3
Maybe your girlfriend is oversensitive, but you compared her to a horse when she was depressed... Imagine you having a bad day and your girlfriend tries to cheer you up by saying you are bad at sex, which is good because she doesnt like sex anyways. Sure it means your girlfriend found something in you she likes, but just because she likes it doesnt make it fun for you.
kitkatkelly 0
Or "I love that you have a tiny penis, that way it never hurts."
girlygirl666 0
Hahaha "Seabiscuit" Good one.
FML_Add1cT 0
Lmfao funny comments and FYL. It is sexy when girls have strong legs.
Matticus433 0
Lol YDI. But do you have any other compliments I can use if I want to loss off a girl? Haha
ohjenxo 0
read The Reader. he calls her a horse. :)
yorkiegirl1691 0
Typical man. Lolllllll :)
6daysoverdue 0
my boyfriend thinks i look like a rabbit. should i be offended? ha. OP, in the movie Mongol, the father tells the main character to 'find a girl with strong legs (they make good wives.)' Tell your gf that. it will console her.
dearViena 0
more guys like him please?