Freudian slip

Today, I was on a bus with my friend's older brother. He was kinda cute. I went to message my best friend, telling her how cute this guy was, how he was kinda packing downstairs, and how adorable he was. Two minutes later, he wordlessly turned his phone screen to me. It was the message. I sent it to him by mistake. FML

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

Today, I was on the bus when my crush told me to come and sit with him. I got all excited, especially when he put his arm around me. He then whispered in my ear "Hey, is your friend over there single?" FML

Today, a guy hit on me. It's such a rare occurrence that I didn't know how to react, so I panicked and said "Sorry, I have to go!" Then I remembered we were on a bus, and just turned around and awkwardly pretended he wasn't there. FML

Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML

Get back here!

Today, I saw a cute guy on the bus. I smiled at him and he smiled back. After a couple of stops, he got off the bus. He bumped into me, turned around, apologized, and winked. I stood there feeling good about myself. Then I realized he stole my wallet. FML

Today, I decided to to gather up the courage to ask the cute boy in my math class for his number. He gave it to me, and I texted him later that night. But little did I know he actually gave me the number of the creep in class who is always grabbing my ass. I ended up asking the creep out. FML

Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML

WTF?

Today, I got off a long shift and went to the bus stop. Upon arrival, I saw a girl giving a guy a blowjob. Disgusted, I tried to avoid them and sat on the bench to wait. The girl popped up angrily and looked over at me. "Can't you give us some privacy?!" This is the only bus stop nearby. FML

Not so sneaky

Today, I was trying to take a sneaky picture of a cute guy sitting across from me on a train. My phone’s flash went off. I panicked, dropped my phone, and then had to awkwardly stand up to retrieve it while he just smirked at me, clearly aware of what had just happened. FML