Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to "Listen to this voicemail." I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty, followed by the bed springs bouncing for three minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
Today, I needed to ask my mom for something, so I went to her room without knocking and walked in on her and her boyfriend fucking. FML
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Top comments
ColbyGB 13
Like mother, like daughter
firechicky 12
look at it this way, maybe one day you can tell your younger brother/sister you heard their conception.
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Comments (38)
kaitieloo 22
Trying to see the correlation between your texts and their sex... As in the relevance...
Ceejay1 13
We all know where you get your dirty thoughts from.
JessicaZado 11
Looks like you weren't the only one in the mood
sophiehall 3
No...
inthedopeshow 17
My favorite part about this is how irrelevant the fact you were sending dirty texts to your boyfriend is to the actual FML
MissMess 12
My favourite part is that teenagers (I'm guessing here OP) still get grossed out by their parents having sex. Honestly I was the same but now I'm an adult with two kids of my own I'm like, you get yours girl! Hahaha.
baileygirl88 8
I agree, I don't understand how they connect either.
xStaciexLynnx 15
Agreed. I was expecting something totally different from this FML when I started reading it. It's like OP just wanted to let us know she was dirty texting and then was like Oh yeah! There's an FML here too...
FlyingPie 17
I'm sensing a pattern in your family.. Can't quite put my finger on it..
Old_Iron_Sides 6
At least it wasn't your mom and your boyfriend having sex.
Raesin 21
Wait so.. you're allowed to have sex but your mum isn't? How did you get here? At least she has a boyfriend and it's not just some random guy.
TVKill3r 15
Right because you wouldn't be grossed or creeped out from hearing one or more of your parents going at it. It's not that it's wrong it's just weird.
bexxiiee 11
I love the irrelevance of the first part of the FML xD
FlyingPie 17
I don't think it's irrelevant. It's that OP is wierded out by hearing her mom doing what OP wants to do with her own boyfriend.
mr_jack_meoff 5
It wasnt even your parents *******, it was just moms getting her nasty on. Her bf will be sneaking in your room.