Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to say it to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend saying, "I shall be the prince, and you shall be the princess," to his hamster. Once he saw me, he quickly turned to the hamster and said, "I have to go. The dragon is here." FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
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Top comments
laurabev 9
Why would you suck on his fingers??
peete182 0
Dont suck things that have been holding hamsters
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Comments (209)
SolemnlyLove 7
lmao if you were so enthusiastic about sucking his fingers, i could only imagine how lucky the bf is
kareltje 17
I think it wasn't his fingers, or the boyfriend. I think she just has a hamster fetish :D
DawnsPlague 0
How did you not smell the pee on his fingers? I mean, your nose is right above your mouth.. Or it should be..
Decapitation 3
I ******* love Thy Art is Murder
xXRiah_GirlXx 9
Well now you know how it tastes.
here4theparty 4
And she wanted to know how it taste why?
leadman1989 16
Hahaha SUCKER!
PinkFun1969 9
I hope you don't get sick. This BF is a real piece of work, watch him close no telling what he could do next. I would put icey hot in his underware. Smile
PinkFun1969 9
testing testing
underguarded 20
Please stop...
My_Nightmare 19
Failing failing
sierralovesyou 0
If I told you that you seemed like a cougar trying to pick up young guys on FML, and that you weren't gonna get any of them because you're a nerd, would it piss you off? :-)
tasteslikedenial 4
Yeah, cause that comment TOTALLY made it seem like she was trying to pick up guys on here... And just for future reference, nerds > bitches. ;)
alival 12
Um just saying what everyone is thinking ur kinda older and nobody rle finds u too sexy....
alival 12
Dude u r so right! Completely agree with u!
sierralovesyou 0
180- look at her profile. Has nothing to do with the comment.
alival 12
I did look at her profile! Aaawwwkkkwwward!!!!
sierralovesyou 0
Thank you!!!!!! It's pretty.. Umm... Scary
alival 12
I think I'm traumatized!!!! :O
sierralovesyou 0
For life! Haha
alival 12
Def! I've been having nightmares about that picture/profile! It's haunting me!!!
satph 12
since when was sucking on someone's fingers 'cute'? :/
False_Stupidity 42
Since as long as lips and fingers have been around.
Rotarun 6
How bad does hamster pee taste?
hipsterteen 7
Texans, what do you expect?
kristen69 0
Wow ur ******* dumb. Obviously u don't care about getting sick since u know his hands were nasty. Sorry but u deserve it! And 28 not all texans are this dumb...
FargoG 3
George Bush...
poemqueen 15
Two examples from that state doesn't mean that everyone from that state are dumb!
RuCheezBurger 10
Have you stopped to consider the fact that she was relaxing and wasnt really paying attention? Maybe then you wouldn't have to post such a retarded comment
hotPinklipstick 24
Relaxing or not she knew he had a hamster in his hands prior to sticking his fingers in her face. She shouldn't stick them in her mouth unless she's knows for a fact he washed his hands, and even then I wouldn't recommend it. Finger nails host plenty of disgusting bacteria that can cause many diseases.
crazychoke 3
Are you sure it's not all texans
Rdvlvt 0
So your saying you suck anything that comes near your face?! That pee is the least of your problems. Wait til you discover herpes... That's a fml