By moo... - 18/05/2013 02:59

Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML
I agree, your life sucks 45 459
You deserved it 13 191

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

Did you tell him to suck on your udders?

aw! and who said romance was dead?!


aw! and who said romance was dead?!

dinosxxrawr 22

this guy sure knows his way to a woman's heart.

And here I was thinking girls like honest guys.

Yeah, when they're honest about how much of a TOTAL BITCH Stacy for work is and how no one appreciates them there. Also, there is no understanding women. Figure that out right now.

Did you offer him a class of milk?

Well I guess we found out we could pay her in grass if we needed a favor

#28 that first part of your comment confused me

#28 I rate that comment 10 stupid out of 10

MrSarcasmic 10

if girls really believed in romance the "friendzone" wouldn't exist

suboy 10

I understand what 28 was getting at. Like when your girlfriend comes home from work and instantly talking about what "that bitch Stacy" did at work today and you have no choice but to be "honest" and agree with her.

Did you tell him to suck on your udders?

Did he try to make a moove on you later that evening?

Pwn17 25

Shoulda said "I'll slaughter you like a cow if you say another word."

Woah now, 17, that's a bit harsh isn't it?

Shush 26, you're talking BULLshit. I'm gonna milk these cow puns for all I can.

Damn...that must have been a MOOd killer. No? Mkay...

then000bster 16

If he had calf the decency to take it back he should have offered to take you to the moovies.

Theyre on a date. Relax

Pwn17 25

@26 Yeah, looking back, it is way too harsh. Sounded a lot funnier in my head. Sorry.

Oh geez, that's a little harsh :/ sorry op!

I dunno; assuming he's telling the truth and OP does chew like a cow then that's pretty disgusting...have you ever seen a cow chewing? :-P

Do cows chew particularly grossly? I mean, I used to live near a cow farm and the cows chewed like any other animal. :O

Well, they often open their mouths quite wide so you can see the cud, and they also end up with green slobber all over their mouths, so yes, they are pretty gross.

They also tend to rotate their lower jaw as they do's gross >_

Don't forget that they regurgitate partially digested food and chew on that again for a while. So yeah, it could be pretty gross.

What a jerk, you should dump him.

She's on a date with a guy she just met. Not a boyfriend.

perdix 29

#25, I don't think she's going to get the chance to dump him. When a guy announces that she chews like a cow on the first date, the idea of a second date is a *lowers sunglasses* MOOt point.

Even if she was dating him, that's a horrible reason to dump someone! OP could very well chew like a cow, slow and deliberate... Although it'd be amusing if she also had a blank stare while eating!

sexyboi1985 27

Do u really ?

C'mon man it's 2 letters and it even says in the rules of commenting no text talk how much harder is it to say you then u.

You skipped two letters in 'come on', a comma or two, a full stop, a question mark, and you used 'then' instead of 'than'.

narkill 13


Then don't chew like a cow, OP.

Does he realise that breaking the silence is supposed to diffuse the awkwardness, not crank it up to 11?

crammer1 6

I'm sure the sound of OP's eating was filling up enough silence for him.

The truth hurts, I guess ;)

What an ass!! Who say stuff like that? And on a first date?

A guy that's hoping there won't be a second date

Someone who obviously has a problem with another person chewing with their mouth open. No one should think that OP's date was a douche. He simply stated an observation of a terrible habit OP likely has.

You should have mooo'd loudly until he was forced to leave.

That's what I would have done.