Love and Health: Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down...

By Anonymous - 10/01/2018 01:30

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 080

You deserved it 526

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Same thing different taste

By wolfwolfy - 13/03/2010 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was on a first date. When the bill came, he refused to pay for my $6 salad. I had to go ATM-hunting to pay for my $6 salad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 086

You deserved it 13 317

By sarahmoon - 05/05/2018 01:30

Today, my date refused to pay for my dinner, even though he promised to beforehand. It turns out, he assumed I would just be ordering a salad for dinner, "based on your slim figure". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 611

You deserved it 538

By Anonymous - 20/08/2014 22:14 - Sweden - ?kersberga

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 955

You deserved it 8 252

By Anonyme - 06/04/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 321

You deserved it 159

By scared - 02/10/2011 21:21 - United States

Today, I went on a date at a restaurant with a guy. When he promised I wouldn't have to pay the bill, I didn't think he meant we'd be dining and dashing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 453

You deserved it 3 443

Smooth talker

By Kate - 07/03/2009 18:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 765

You deserved it 8 263

By Anonymous - 26/09/2009 14:24 - United States

Today, I went on my first date in nearly a year. A few minutes into the meal, he called me "scrumptious" and made animal noises for the rest of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 170

You deserved it 3 328

Let's do this again?

By Giselle - 13/10/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a date with a guy who insisted on eating off my plate the whole night. He didn't order his own food, because according to him, "it’s more intimate to share." He didn’t get why I found the whole deal off-putting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 60

By Anonymous - 09/03/2011 16:07 - Canada

Today, I went on a dinner date with the guy I like. He ate all his food then started eating off my plate, going on to eat over half of my food. When the bill came, he made me pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 253

You deserved it 7 458

By Cheap N Happy - 17/02/2012 09:44 - United States

Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 709

You deserved it 4 563

Busymomma12 6

Friday 5 January 2018 18:44

and thats when you got up and left

ivolleyball12 12

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:06

I hope you said l “and you’re having dinner by yourself”

Comments

Busymomma12 6

Friday 5 January 2018 18:44

and thats when you got up and left

my2centsworth 15

Wednesday 10 January 2018 1:48

Your life sucks only if you remained.

ivolleyball12 12

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:06

I hope you said l “and you’re having dinner by yourself”

Suzi_d16 27

Thursday 11 January 2018 0:17

*aye

Hellblazer_Sith 25

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:14

So hopefully you got up and left? I

manb91uk 22

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:20

“And you’re masturbating tonight using your lonely tears for lubrication” would be the adequate response to that. Followed by a swift exit.

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:23

“Thank you so much for your concern with my health. By the way, you are drinking water. I get to look out for you, too, right?”

Glowworm56 26

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:25

"And you're paying for yourself. Enjoy your dinner for one."

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:25

That's when you tell him "I hope you enjoy dinners for one.", and leave.

ffc Squall 14

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:40

He's a keeper, as in keep him away from you!

Chazzster 28

Wednesday 10 January 2018 2:42

I hope it was also OP’s LAST date with this guy. What an amazing idiot he was....

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I hit off with a guy I met on Tumblr, and we moved to Discord to chat. We're just friends, but have things in common. Then I accidentally called him while he was driving by clicking the wrong button, because I forgot how to search things up. Now he thinks I'm a creep. Time to build my walls back up again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 158

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 278

The Top

Today, I went to wish one of my friends a happy birthday on his Facebook wall, only to see that I was blocked. Turns out, he blocked me because he'd developed a crush on me for some time and couldn’t stand seeing the posts between me and my new boyfriend. So basically I can only be his friend if I’m single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 175

Today, and for months now, the meds that stop me from killing myself have killed my sex drive. My boyfriend, being stressed at work, initially assured me that his was also non existent and not to worry. I found out he's been wanking every day and hiding it from me so I don't feel bad. Now I know, I feel fucking awful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 386

You deserved it 632

Today, I went to get Covid test because I had chest pain and shortness of breath. Turns out, I just have depression and anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 133

Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 337

You deserved it 8 126

Today, my mom decided to show me her new rape whistle. She kept blowing it every couple of minutes while we were stuck in traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 689

You deserved it 1 521

Today, my wife straight up knocked my mother out cold with a straight jab to the face, turned to walk away, cracked her neck and announced to the world, “I’ve been waiting 4 years to do that.” What the hell has been going on around here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 244

Same thing different taste

Smooth talker

Let's do this again?

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