Today, I was dirty texting my boyfriend since we couldn't see each other this weekend. We were getting really into it when he said, "If only you were this good in real life." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Candidly
Today, I finally gave in to my long-distance boyfriend's requests and texted him dirty things. Any time I would send him something, he would reply, "What?" or "What do you mean?" Either I'm not doing this right, or I'm in a relationship with the most innocent person ever. FML
Steamy
Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Mood: broken
Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Make believe
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Turned off
Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said, "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML
Top comments
greenmachine08 0
10 bucks says he was jerkin off while he said that
n_maher 0
hahahahahha awwww that sucks, maybe it's because you are a bit more adventurous texting that real life, that's ok, just time for a bit of a change I think :) have some fun.
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Comments (69)
sourgirl101 29
People tend to become braver when they are not face to face. So now you know your boyfriend likes the freak in you, so go wild next time you're together. I sex text my husband all the time and I'm far from shy. Alot of men love women to take charge!
johnnydudeman 0
OP should try bondage I think. If her boyfriend didn't like it, atleast he gets "punished".
FYLDeep 26
What's that supposed to mean though? You would think that having the person be present would always be better than an alternative where you're by yourself.
ImaginaryFoe 1
He probably prefers something to nothing but just wishes she were more adventurous when they are together. OP, deliver what you promise. And try not to be too upset with him for hus tactlessness. Apparently both of you are braver when you're apart. I would examine a relationship where you are unable to be open with each other but that's just me, I guess.
redtigerlily 5
ydi for talking the talk but not walking the walk
greenmachine08 0
17- ur so hot! ;)
baker63 3
dirty texting is so much fun you can say all of the things you want to do but maybe to shy to do
linzb752 0
haha!
npeezle 0
YDI for being a prude IRL.
liljeron 0
MOOD KILLER!!!
yagurlteeteexoxo 0
JUST PRACTICE MORE OP U WILL BECOME A PRO ONE DAY. EVERYONE HAD TO PRACTICE N B GOOD LEARNERS. AIN'T SHIT IN DIS TO FYL ABOUT IT COULD B FIX WIT SOME WORK SMH.
lu95 16
its sexting