Today, I was at the mall and started singing along to the playing of "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas." A kid glanced at me and said to her mom, "She IS a hippopotamus." FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my family and I watched Madagascar 2. When we got to the part where Gloria the hippopotamus is praised for her chunkyness, my little sister looked at me and said, "If you were a hippo, maybe then you would get a date." FML
Today, I saw a kid getting bullied; a girl was hitting him in the head. After having an inner struggle with what to do, I tried to stop them. Both kids then turned on me, and called me a "hippo". FML
Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting "MONKEY CUNTS" at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML
Today, I went to the mall. A little girl was walking around and telling everyone that they were pretty. When she got to me, she gave me a disgusted look and walked away. FML
Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML
Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
Today, at the supermarket, my mother stopped in the middle of a lane and imitated a gorilla as a way of asking me from far away if I wanted any bananas. FML
Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML
Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML
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Top comments
slushpup9696 12
So... you're looking for a mate?
apv0222 0
Little kids and their honesty...
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Comments (244)
tannerianian 11
What an aashole kids these days...
burninnapalm 5
Save big money! Save big money! When you shop Menards!
c0c0_fml 16
This reminds me of a story my mom told me.. When I was about 3 years old, one of her patient who was obese passed away and I asked if it was because she exploded... :s
soopafreak 11
That's stinkin' hilarious...er...I mean, that's so wrong...
TalkinSmack 6
Ouch!
juliaspencer 0
Ctfu ! Damn thats tuff .
StoryOfTheYear 15
168- Shit, Goodwill was putting up Christmas stuff after Halloween. Winter comes early in Minnesota.
lazy_ella 7
168 - I'm in London where "Harrods" and "Selfridges" put up Christmas decorations and hired a Santa in JULY! Seriously.
lazy_ella 7
Well unless you have exceptional hearing she said it quite loudly for you to hear hear over the music, so if the mother didn't correct the child and she's almost a teen, I hope you gave the mother a stern look for not instilling basic manners. It's children like that, that bully others.
BaconBoy75 2
Hippos are the deadliest creatures in the wild, so she should be very afraid of you.
darkmis1 18
I've never heard of that song...