Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I heard a gunshot not too far from the house. This is not unusual, as I live way out in the boonies and hunters tend to roam the woods. What isn't normal is a stray bullet hitting my above-ground pool, which promptly split open and released a torrent of water that flooded my basement. FML
Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML
Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, my dog proudly brought home a rabbit he'd killed. The same rabbit that belongs to my neighbor's daughter. FML
Today, I was on my back patio talking with my husband. It got dark outside, and I saw something shuffling in the back yard. I freaked out so bad that I went to run inside, only to fly face-first into the screen door. Turns out the shuffling was a baby rabbit. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
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Top comments
narks 0
Not only did you try to kill it instead of just relocating it, but you tried to justify your shit aim with 'the bullet missed' instead of 'I missed'. This one calls for a YDI unfortunately.
tkmac 0
Sounds like a Tom & Jerry episode.
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Comments (868)
wonderbud 0
jesus who the hells first reaction to a problem is "... rifle". Frankly you scare me...not even a joke...
musu_fml 0
#195: "It's not like we NEED heme iron and animal protein in our diets!" We DON'T need them; not specifically from animals anyway. We need protein because protein is made up of amino acids, and there are certain amino acids (eight of them) that our body can't make itself. You can get these just as easily from vegetable protein; in beans, grains (wheat, etc), nuts; eat some beans and bread and you're getting some. There's nothing magical about animal protein (after all, where do you think the herbivores got their protein?) As for iron; pretty much any green leafy veg will be chock full of it. You're talking nonsense. If you like meat and want to eat it, do so. Just don't pretend that you HAVE to, because you don't. As a PS: PETA are a misguided terrorist organisation and I disagree with both their goals and the means they use to obtain them.
babydoll86_fml 0
You thought an innocent animal deserved to die because it ate some plants in your garden? My goodness, you're one screwed up person. Have some respect for the lives of other beings. YDI it massively.
musu_fml 0
#238: "Also, those who spoke of trespassing, do you really think that animals should be expected to understand our logic (or lack thereof, in the case of most people)? They see an unprotected easily accessible food source, and they eat it. Why? Because it's there. If you don't want them to eat it, be smart." So when a mosquito bites you, you let it drink your blood, an unprotected easily available food source, without interruption? This isn't just about food; it's about property, that costs work and money; if a wild animal got into your home and started utterly trashing it, you would do nothing to stop it because you don't expect it to understand the logic that your home is your property, your territory?
benw2200 0
I could care less that you tried to kill an innocent animal. The fact that you missed your target, and obviously by a pretty wide margin. YDI for having no gun control.
namelessfew 0
Agrees with #1. You're an ass. There are sulfur-based smelly gardening stuff to keep bunnies away from gardens. YDI. I hope you over paid for that pool.
crackr0ckst3ady9 0
work on your aim, sure you'll get it next time the rabbit deserves that shit
Waabishkii_ikwe 0
Okay, veggies, here's some food for thought: Plants are alive too. Just because they can't feel pain (and even that's debated) does not mean that they're any less important. If you're going to claim that killing is bad in any circumstance, then live off of nothing but fruit. It may still have living cells, but it's offered to us by the plants. Oh, but wait! I bet there were pesticides used in producing that fruit, which means innocent insects were killed. Guess you can't eat that either, douche bags. I suggest you starve to death; we need less people like you. I don't believe that anything should be killed unless it's for food. Except humans, of course. We should try and leave those alone. Eating them is considered cannibalism, and is generally a bad idea. YDI for being a shitty shot, though. I understand that you tried to kill it, but apparently you suck at killing things, so next time try a fricking fence around your garden or some rabbit-repellent stuff. That tends to work a lot better than blowing a hole in your pool.
peel_fml 0
Do you think it was very fair of you to attempt to kill another live emotional being for trespassing in an area that he didn't realize he was not supposed to be in? REALLY? I'm glad you missed, and I'm glad that your basement is flooded. Maybe now you see the damage that a gun can cause.
suffertheseason 0
The poor bunny was just hungry. I'm pretty sure he wasn't purposely trying to inconvenience you. Ever heard of a live animal trap? Jeez. Whatever. You deserve it.