Today, I walked in on my dad's poker game. He didn't know I was there, and was telling his friends what he would do to my girlfriend if I wasn't dating her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, my girlfriend's parents walked in on us having sex. Not only did her dad make me walk out to my truck with no clothes on, he is my baseball coach and I will be seeing him on Monday. FML
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom and dad. It wasn't my dad. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML
Today, my dad called in a rage, saying he caught my "cheating whore" girlfriend at a bar on a date. I had to admit to him that she and I participate in a cuckold lifestyle. The sheer disgust and disappointment in his voice has been haunting me all day. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
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Top comments
DerrickJames 33
Maybe he was bluffing?
Riya2595 15
You can use this against him later.
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Comments (50)
reflexion213 11
So he's plotting on your woman and you're crying on the Internet. Lucky girl.
WhiteCrimson 23
How can anyone say you deserved it? Dude thats just. Ot cool
Perdition25 12
There are a lot of challenged people out there.
triplebeerox 27
It's actually to your benefit that you overheard your dad. Now you know not to leave your gf alone with him; he might get too tempted and try something...
truesarrif 33
sounds like your king of spades is after your queen of hearts. your only Ace in the hole is to be a Jack of all trades and step your game up to a 10. then you can Straight flush his fantasy down the tubes
LyraAlluse 25
You sir are a genius. This is the best comment I have read all night.
D3ATHZ3RO 15
So...how old r u and ur gf?
worldclassrager 41
Looks like you found out a good secret maybe you can give him a run for his money...
onorexveritas 24
that is ****** up on so many levels
dragonkyng 11
I'd have poked my head in and said that that would never happen since she doesn't like creepy old perverts
khoihuynh30 9
At least you must have a somewhat attractive gf
hlew 10
Hopefully he at least means with her consent? This is just as much of an FML for his girlfriend I would think. Especially if they're teenagers. Creepy and inappropriate!