Today, I walked in on my dad's poker game. He didn't know I was there, and was telling his friends what he would do to my girlfriend if I wasn't dating her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, my girlfriend's parents walked in on us having sex. Not only did her dad make me walk out to my truck with no clothes on, he is my baseball coach and I will be seeing him on Monday. FML
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom and dad. It wasn't my dad. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML
Today, my dad called in a rage, saying he caught my "cheating whore" girlfriend at a bar on a date. I had to admit to him that she and I participate in a cuckold lifestyle. The sheer disgust and disappointment in his voice has been haunting me all day. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
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Top comments
DerrickJames 33
Maybe he was bluffing?
Riya2595 15
You can use this against him later.
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Comments (50)
kaylabears98 3
I am so sorry.... What a jackass.
AkiChan_fml 7
At least he's not doing her WHILE you're dating.......
Shredder2 5
And that's how relationships between fathers and sons are ruined.
sammyjo06 14
Your dad's a dirty pervert, but at least he specified he'd only do these things if you weren't dating her, I guess. Take the small comforts where they come...
Guinness96 1
ewwww it was probably like raping uer
Capt_Colorz 8
SHAME HIM!! Say he probly couldn't get it up even if he convinced her
cryfavreau 10
my question is how old is your girlfriend? better be over 18.....
HoranHugs 7
If there was a prize for having the best Poker Face, Damn, you'd win by a landslide.
pepeneki 15
Like father, like son
DirtySalamander 9
i would have drop kick him right there