Transportation: Today, I trying to scrape the ice off my car, but wasn't having...

By ColdMN - 03/02/2011 17:02 - United States

Today, I trying to scrape the ice off my car, but wasn't having much luck. Frustrated, I kicked a clump off from the bumper. The clump didn't budge, but the entire front quarter panel fell off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 225

You deserved it 11 094

Transportation

Be the hero

Happy Birthday, I guess…

Is it though?

By quackers - 08/07/2016 07:00 - United States - Columbus

Today, I found out that my favorite pizza place will no longer deliver to my area after dark because they've been robbed too many times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 793

You deserved it 1 188

By KilledTheMoment - 23/11/2014 06:10 - United States - Mundelein

Today, I spent nearly an hour helping a customer pick out an engagement ring. I rang him up, picked out a super cute box for the ring, and wished him luck. Later I realized I never put the ring inside the box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 003

You deserved it 17 796

By Faaccckkk - 25/03/2013 14:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 879

You deserved it 3 312

Take what you can get

By Anonymous - 20/04/2021 00:30 - Netherlands

Today, I got the most action I've had in about 3 years when my dentist pressed her boobs against the top of my head to fill my cavities. I really need to get me a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 126

By Filingfordivorce - 18/05/2017 16:00

Today, it seems my husband didn't realize that "Office Space" is just a movie and began to act like the characters in a pathetic attempt to, "stand up to the establishment!" Perhaps he also didn't realize that attempted arson is considered a federal crime. The bail is $20,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 211

You deserved it 408

By iLikeMyLegs - 09/05/2013 23:18 - Canada - Oshawa

Today, I was rushed to the ER due to a very swollen foot and high fever. The doctors said I just have a tissue infection but my parents believe I have a flesh eating disease. I can hear them discussing my future with an amputated leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 469

You deserved it 2 655

By ohdamn - 22/09/2009 11:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the dentist. I parked my car in what I thought was the dentist's car park. It was actually the car park for the business next door. I had to watch them clamp my car from the dentist's chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 682

You deserved it 6 784

By Anonymous - 10/06/2019 05:19 - United Kingdom - Oldbury

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I was too tired for sex, which she interpreted as me confessing to not wanting to have sex with her because I’m having sex with other women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 272

You deserved it 263

Good enough reason

By Anonymous - 17/05/2017 20:00

Today, I finally found out why my girlfriend doesn't want kids. She discovered Rugrats recently and, after binge watching the whole series, decided that our would-be children would be too adventurous for us to handle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 064

You deserved it 448

By brizzle - 05/04/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 349

You deserved it 6 339

By bathroomblunder - 07/03/2010 02:38 - Canada

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 773

You deserved it 4 508

By Whytetrash - 20/06/2013 06:32 - Australia - Sydney

Today, a customer broke my nose for refusing to give him a discount because the product he was buying had a fine layer of dust on the box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 006

You deserved it 3 212

By Stressed dad - 18/07/2017 20:00

Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 998

You deserved it 998

By 352 - 18/04/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 263

You deserved it 4 168

By Anon. - 28/11/2009 12:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to look at my positive eBay feedback to feel loved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 986

You deserved it 6 206

By Anonymous - 16/09/2014 16:18 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 302

You deserved it 4 036

By slickrick22 - 27/02/2012 02:43 - United States

Today, I had a dream about the damn cappuccino machine at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 530

You deserved it 3 913

By Anonymous - 12/07/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, I went to the water park, and got in a line on a staircase to get on a waterslide. A couple minutes in, I feel a large amount of warm liquid drip on my head. Seconds later, a crying girl was being lead down the stairs being told that 'everyone wets themselves sometimes'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 386

You deserved it 2 705

By Khrixas_069 - 18/06/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 689

You deserved it 58 479

By Anonymous - 07/12/2014 19:20 - Ireland - Galway

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 551

You deserved it 3 661

By { o } - 22/03/2015 17:41 - United States - Miami

Today, an old man approached me at work. I smiled and asked, "Hi, can I help you"? He looked at me for a few seconds before replying, "Fuck me, you need to lose some weight!" and then wandering off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 496

You deserved it 3 698

By Anonymous - 27/12/2015 00:38 - Brazil - Itaja?

Today, my father is really enjoying the iPhone my mother gave him for Christmas. He's enjoying it so much that he's already installed all sorts of dating apps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 877

You deserved it 1 573

Brotherly love

By Sad guy - 08/01/2021 20:01 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I felt so lonely that I was almost jealous of the way Chris Cuomo and Don Lemon playfully express affection for each other on CNN. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 204

By Blurry - 30/09/2009 19:30 - Philippines

Today, I joined a small disaster relief group. I remarked to the big, long-haired person beside me that it was surprising that I was the only female in the group. I got a cold stare. Later I asked another volunteer about that person. He answered, "Oh, her? She's my sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 212

You deserved it 38 929

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 288

You deserved it 4 963

By Anonymous - 22/10/2014 17:37 - United States - Allen

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 717

You deserved it 7 215

By Scared4Lf - 19/08/2016 18:10 - United States - Lamoure

Today, I was awoken by my grandparents making love, as they shook the camper in which my cousin and I were sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 823

You deserved it 1 511

By dzisfml - 14/02/2010 08:42 - Canada

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to rub Tabasco sauce on my household toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 481

You deserved it 4 602

By howtobesingle - 07/04/2016 02:45 - Norway - Oslo

Today, I listened to my best friend complain, again, about the two guys she's seeing, and how she doesn't know which one to choose, because they're both perfect. Meanwhile, I'm cleaning up my dog's loose stools, haven't had a date in over three years and I'm also sharing a room with the very same best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 245

You deserved it 1 979

By PicklesMcRaptor - 25/03/2012 11:59 - United States - Miami

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 576

You deserved it 3 513

By uglynerd - 26/05/2013 00:45 - United States - Streamwood

Today, my parents told me they're glad I'm an "ugly nerd" because they don't have to worry about me getting into trouble or having a teen pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 718

You deserved it 4 589

Blackout

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 16:01

Today, I woke up from a night of serious depression, drinking by myself at home, to find a USB stick wrapped in plastic up my vagina, with "Top secret" written on it. There was nothing on the stick when I checked. I may need to give tequila a rest and switch back to gin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 1 545

By cmart_9 - 29/10/2013 04:24 - United States - Clayton

Today, my girlfriend got a detention for public display of affection. We go to different schools. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 127

You deserved it 4 458

By goodbye-college - 15/08/2010 04:12 - Canada

Today, I found out I won't be able to go to college. Why? My sister's horse needs surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 268

You deserved it 5 228

By smeeagain - 21/10/2011 01:17 - United States

Today, I was chaperoning at my local high school's Homecoming dance. Outside the gym, I saw some kids drinking, so I walked over to stop them. One of them promptly spun around and punched me in the mouth. I had my ass handed to by a drunk 9th grader. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 465

You deserved it 6 348

By ehcanadianeh - 13/12/2015 20:04 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found $20 under my car seat, so I put it in the cup holder, only for it to fly out of the window while going down the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 681

You deserved it 12 015

Stress test

By haramara - 25/05/2021 17:01

Today, while driving on the streets for the first time, my mom decided that it would be an appropriate time to yell at me for every single mistake I’ve ever made in my life. This stressed me out so much I began driving against traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 127

Cool, dude

By lamemom - 05/04/2014 22:05 - Canada - Fredericton

Today, my friend saw a stamp on my hand and asked me which club I had gone to last night. I was so desperate to seem cool that I lied, instead of admitting it was actually from a children's play group that I took my kids to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 005

You deserved it 8 891

By Brad - 03/01/2013 06:47 - United States - Harrisburg

Today, I went to dinner with my girlfriend of 2 months. This would have been great, had I not been nodding absentmindedly when she suggested that we start planning our wedding soon, because "she's always dreamt of being married on the same day as Brad and Angelina." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 919

You deserved it 25 578

By Anonymous - 01/01/2019 11:00 - United States - Spokane

Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 728

You deserved it 178

Add a comment - Reply to : #

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

cameront777 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:38

hitting things is definitely always the best solution

Gfrigo 1

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 3:25

there is no "front" quarter panels on a car. their called fenders. quarter panels are only on the rear.

Psychotic_Snail 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:26

tough luck but ydi

truehitman2010 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:32

ydi

xxxNataliexxx 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:33

uberletepoon 10

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:34

uh oh better get maaco

cameront777 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:38

hitting things is definitely always the best solution

ahriel 0

Send a private message

Thursday 3 February 2011 23:56

lol nice!

nocanhaz 4

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 0:41

Failure is inevitable. When just trying to clean up your car you end up knocking off a panel of it. I congratulate you on your stupidity.

rockefoe 6

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 1:39

hahaha that's like in a movie! brilliant.

Gfrigo 1

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 3:25

there is no "front" quarter panels on a car. their called fenders. quarter panels are only on the rear.

Hellishness 6

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 9:30

thank you!

therealdavid 0

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 14:50

they're*

firechicken86 0

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 19:42

First he was right. It is there as they`re is short for they are which they are is no front quarter panel would make no sense. So, with that being said way to be a dumb as and fail correcting someone. Second, I agree at THERE not being a front quarter panel.

Igor_g5 0

Send a private message

Friday 4 February 2011 23:14

Technically they can be and sometimes are called quarter panels. Most of us call them fenders. That being said, I don't see how it could come off with all those bolts holding it on.